You walk into a bar…

I felt like something light hearted today, so here’s a bunch of funny/lame/good for a laugh pickup lines I found on the internet (basically googled “funny pick up lines” and clicked the first link). Yeah, some you may have heard, I get it. Oh, please, don’t ever try it.

Can I buy you a drink – or would you just prefer the five bucks?

I wish I were a tear so i could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot.

You know what would look great on you? Me.

Is your name Gillette? Because you’re the best a man can get!

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

Let’s make like fabric softener and snuggle.

You have 206 bones in your body. Do you want another one?

And the one I tell people: (not to pick up)

Do you have a quarter? Because I want to call my mom to tell her I met the girl of my dreams.

De Fluffe, OUT!

9 thoughts on “You walk into a bar…

  1. To whenhopeislost: I came across that and laughed but that one was rather old so I didn’t post it. Besides, that can be a rather valid one if you and she is drunk enough.

    Lol yes Julia, I was the one who taught her that one.

  2. a variation of your first line
    “Let’s go and eat pizza and then f*ck, or don’t you like pizza?”

  3. how about:
    are your parents retarded, because i think you’re special 😀

    Favourite would be the :
    “What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.”
    LOL-ED at that one .

    and I dont get the Gillette one :\

  4. To my property: What if they weren’t wearing shoes?
    To whenhopeislost: I don’t think you quite get the connotation to that line. Five “bucks”?
    D.P.: Gillette is a shaving razor brand. Their ad tagline goes “Gillette, the best a man can get.”
    Vania: Do you remember the one where Annie tried to “read” Julia’s palm when really she just wanted to hold her hand? That was sweet.

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