Pictures are all that I have

Sometimes – no, almost always- I wish I could be in photos with them, so it actually looks and feels like I’m in the group.

I’m never really there, when the mood strikes. And the mood never strikes, when I am there.

I try not to take it personally, but each of their smiles makes my heart rip.

I am not going to take it personally, dammit. I said I’m tired of this shit, but I still let myself get caught up in it.