Your Lipstick His Collar, Don’t Bother, Angel

[Cute Without The E (Cut From The Team) – Taking Back Sunday]

I’m writing this at past 5 pm so I would have no idea who will win the Australian election, but I thought I’d write something now before I get submerged into the world of Pokemon.

First of all, I know that who I voted for will cause some eyebrow raises – in fact I refused to tell my parents who I voted for because I think if I did, they might freak. But it was my vote, am I right? If you voted for Liberals, I would sigh and ask you repeatedly ‘why’, but I wouldn’t hate you or anything for it. It’s like if my incredibly adorable and non-existent puppy peed on my foot. I would sigh and tap it on the nose and sound disappointed, but I won’t hate it.

Just as we ducked out of our car, my parents and I, and walked towards the primary school where the voting was taking place in my neighborhood, it started pouring like mad. I thought it was ironically (if not self-centeredly) appropriate, because I was heading towards my first political action, and boom the heavens decide to weep.

I was originally going to go in with a 1 for Labour and 4 for Family First (again, I’m not against families, but I don’t like their policies even more). But then when I got my name ticked off, and stood at the ballot booth (which was less of a booth and more of a table with blinders), I looked at the green slip of paper.

I live in the electorate of Bruce (I think it’s pretty safe to say which electorate I live in publicly) so I can’t be sure what the other electorates’ green slips looked like, but on mine, from top to bottom, the House of Reps candidates went as: Liberals, Greens, Family First, Labour.

Right next to my green slip of paper was this brochure that “taught” us how to vote for Liberals in Bruce. It showed a Donkey vote, or 1, 2, 3, 4 in that order going down the paper. So Liberals would be first, Labour last. For some reason, that infuriated me. I wanted to use my pencil and punch through the face of the candidate on that brochure. Then I heard my parents 2 booths down talking to each other about what numbers to put down. Mom was asking where Labour was, and saying “screw the rest” (or to that effect). Then, remembering the Greens campaign ads and the ceiling cat, I made my decision. Putting a 1 next to Greens, I went down the list.

Empowered by my radical decision to vote for a small party instead of the usual Labour/Liberal, I looked at my much larger white piece of paper (for the Senate, the upper house). Well at this point my parents were already done, and I just wanted to go home (I had an essay to write). So looking over the top row, the first word that caught my eye was “Sex”. Yes, the Australian Sex Party managed to get my attention using the oldest trick in the book. I smiled to myself, but then went on to look for either Greens or Labour.

Then my Yr 12 Legal Studies class came back to me; Senate voting is different. It’s not really who gets the majority seat in each electorate, but as long as they get a certain amount of votes, a party will have a seat in the Senate (or something along those lines. Look I got low 30s for my Legal Studies, I don’t remember exactly). And I thought; as little as my one vote in my rather conservative electorate may count, I might as well do my part. I hate homophobia, because I don’t even see a good reason why it occurs apart from the fact that a really old book said so. I also agree with quite a few of the Australian Sex Party’s views. Even if they may never get the chance to exercise any Bills, I want them in the Senate to oversee the Bills that do go through. So, being the lazy radical that I have turned out to be, I put a lonesome 1 next to their still-funny name, folded my paper, and walked to the ballot box.

So tonight I will be watching the movies on GO! and playing Pokemon instead of watching the results. I’m not hopeful enough to think that Greens or the ASP would get anywhere enough power, so I might as well enjoy myself. Besides, Twitter will keep me updated on what is happening.

Nearly 800 words to describe what was a 60-second story. Ironically, the essay (that I did manage to finish, if not shonkily) is also 800 words. Funny how much faster I can do it here.

Alex.