I had Oral…Exam

You’re right, Dom, that joke never gets old.

Yes! Yes! I have done and dusted my Chinese oral…exam forever and ever and ever! Never again would I have to describe myself in 20 seconds or less, or recite the 3 points of my detailed studies.

The sad part is, while doing my detailed studies, I’d said that I had 4 main points. I had to backpedal quickly and say 3.

To be short, the oral…exam was semi-epic-fail. The general conversation was good, despite my two male examiners (MALE! BOTH OF THEM! Female ones smile more) starting me off with “how did you get here?” and I just sat there desperately trying to remember how to say “train” in Chinese, I was that nervous.

The det. stud. was a bit worse. I really forgot a lot of my info half way through and started stuttering (I guess that problem would resurface sooner or later when I’m nervous) so I had to make stuff up. The downside of getting male examiners and me doing a rather masculine topic is that they actually had a general understanding of my topic, and knew when I was bullshitting (as opposed to when I had females for mock exam, and they thought I was very well researched. Baha). In fact the younger male examiner had the expression of “bullshit bullshit” on his face in the last 3 minutes.

I just hope they give me marks for repair strategies and ability to maintain conversation, and not mark me down for contents. Haha.

Fa had dyed her hair brown! I haven’t seen her like that in a while, and I just felt it would be great injustice not to suggest that she keep that hair color forever. Hey Fa, I really think that brown suits you more and makes you look more elegant than orange/blonde. She also wore a “conservative” outfit, namely jeans and a baggy jumper (which she borrowed off her mom. I doubted it was hers anyway).

I’ve never really been nervous much before, I’ve been excited and nervous yet but not just nervous. I actually felt myself shaking a bit waiting outside the classroom, and Lyd- who was with me tried to calm me down by telling me my hair looked good.

It worked.

Well, it was all said, and done, and dusted, and blown away, and I did a little dance afterwards. Now, onto Methods and Legal! Then it will be 3 weeks until my English exam.

1 down, 6 to go!

Alex.

Just can’t get a break

I had the most unlucky happening today.
Going to the mock oral I thought I’d get Spanna’s mom. No. Instead I got the teacher I had last year, you know, the teacher whom I mouthed off to all last year. Who, at the end of the year said, “I’m so glad I don’t have to teach you anymore.” And I said, “I’m glad I don’t have to be taught by you.”
Woo.
Alex.

To be in Love…or not to be?

For the last 2 weeks in Chinese school we’d been doing practises for our upcoming SAC which is the oral. In the oral we’re meant to persuade our parents (as performed by our teacher) to allow us to do a certain something.

(By the way, I know I said I’d write like Dom for this blog. I thought about it. I’d rather stay sane.)

This week, my partner and myself are to perform “Should teenagers date in high school?”

And the really depressing part was, as I was preparing for it (I didn’t get far. I have Chinese school this afternoon and I still don’t know what I’m saying) I realize I can’t actually think of 5 good logical reasons why teenagers SHOULD date in high school because actually, there aren’t that many solid arguments.

So far, I have:

You can help each other with homework (easily debunkable)

He can keep you safe (assuming the oral is performed by a girl which I am. Oh wait I just read that again. Ha)

It is a part of social life that everyone has to experience

All my friends are doing it

But the thing is, I have a strong conviction that dating isn’t necessarily BAD in high school. I mean if it makes you happy, and you’re responsible enough to be…well responsible, then I don’t see the problem. But of course if you get right down to it, there are a million reasons for parents to say no and very little for them to say yes.

Anyway, wish me luck for my presentation. It’s nothing official so I don’t really care but, still, I don’t want to fuck up either.

Alex.

Methods SAC

Today was the first 3/4 Methods SAC. I had a triple free at the end of the day so I did a little bit of work in P4, had lunch in the Common Room with Dani (who was going bananas over her Lit SAC in the very next double) and then in P5 and 6 bunkered down in the library and did a few exercises.

SAC wasn’t too bad, I suppose. I had people reckon that the SAC was harder than the 2nd test, which I found absurd seeing as I got 69% for the 2nd test (haha 69) so it either means I am falsely confident and I am so fucked for this SAC, or they were wrong. There was one irksome question, which I know I did not get. But, really, it wasn’t altogether too bad.

After the seemingly obligatory post-SAC-mortem, Carmaine, Fel and I went to buy some junk/comfort food at Flinders, before taking an old train home.

Now I await my results.

My week’s outlook is not bright:

Friday: Grand Prix so I will bunker at home and study for my English SAC which is in a week, my English Language SAC which is in a week and a day, and perhaps if I can be bothered my Chinese SAC which is a day before my English. Flipside? After next Tuesday, I can thoroughly enjoy my last week of wearing school uniforms.

Speaking of which, we tried on the hoodies today in the Common Room, and I was (figuratively) swimming in the XS. I sure am looking forward to wearing the jumpers, though, because that will show the stupid Juniors who the Yr 12s are.

And, I suppose, speaking of 69. Andrew got a new – and what I call – “Special Poster” which he so gleefully showed me last week. It was the Periodic Table of Elements, except replace the last word with “Sex-Positions”. There were, for example, and this was actually the only example which I paid attention to – or rather, dared to pay attention to, the “Standing 69.” It came complete with a graphic illustration/instruction, employing 2 artist’s mannequins, one for female and one for male. And where the Table of Elements have the extra bit along the bottom, Andrew had “Advanced Positions” which, at a glance, seemed to defy gravity.

A suitably awkward yet highly amusing topic of conversation.

I spent my weekend watching Just for Laughs Gags online. They are. INGENIUS. I hope I do get onto the video committee so I can perhaps employ some of those gags. Oh and Bianca and Fel are on the Formal Committee, Bee being the General Manager. That sounds really important, so congratulations to her!

Longest post in a while. Sorry I have been so quiet lately (and this was reflected on my blog hits). I suppose getting Facebook was a very bad disease for the popularity of my blog, and also I suppose Yr 12 VCE was also a crippling handicap. Besides, there really haven’t been much of write-worthy lately.

OH AND, I NEARLY FORGOT! Today Gen and Bec shaved their heads. A public spectacle at lunchtime, and both shed tears. We love those two, though. What a good cause!

D.F.

A Bit Of Comic Relief…At Someone Else’s Expense

What other kind of comedy is there? I mean, in the end the funniest kind of comedy is always when someone else is suffering right? “Any amount of pain, just below death, is funny,” said Jim Carrey (or Steve Carell. Damn I can’t remember.)

So, on my blogroll sits a link to a site called Overheard Everywhere. For those who might not have caught onto what Overheard Everywhere is about, it’s a site where people contribute quotes or conversations they overhear, all over the world. As Vania had once done (dude, I really need to stop leeching off you. We all know how much leeches are a bother), I’ll put up some rather funny ones:

(Warning: I don’t have a good sense of inappropriateness. So, unlike Vania, my choices might have a lot of swearing or huge sexual references. Huge. Yeah…)

Girl #1: What’s an orgasm?
Girl #2: It’s like when two people get excited during sex.
Girl #1: So, like, when they go “rawwwrr!”
Girl #2: Uh…yeah. Sure.

—

College guy: This must be a joke. We live in a city called “Cumming,” we have a store called “BJ’s,” and a store called “Dick’s,” and a “Siemens” water tower.

—
Dad to little girl: I’m going to feed you to a puppy.
Little girl: Dad! I don’t want to eat a puppy.
Dad: I’m not going to feed you a puppy, I’m going to feed you to a puppy.
Little girl: Oh, that’s okay, I like puppies.

—

Ten-year-old girl to passing adult man: What’s your name?
Mother, scolding: Do you have to hit on every man you see?

—

Asian chick: I’m going to meet my old boss at that Thai restaurant. You know, the one with the woman that feels me up.
Asian dude: Oh, yeah. Aren’t all Thai women bisexual?

—

Nurse #1 (during break): I hope you don’t mind, I took one of your cigarettes from your purse because I was really craving one.
Nurse #2: it’s no problem. (pause) Wait. Was it my last one?
Nurse #1: Yeah…is that a problem?
Nurse #2 (furious): Are you fucking kidding me?!
Nurse #1: Yeah, yeah, relax! I was just kidding. There’s two more in there.
Nurse #2: Oh my god. Don’t joke about things like that.
Nurse #1 (nervously): Hahaha. I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t scared for my life just now.
Nurse #2 (seriously): And I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t thinking of places to hide your body.

—

Physical education teacher, demonstrating the overhead smash in badminton: So I’m gonna find myself in a bad position and Sean is just gonna unload on me.

—

Elderly woman: I can’t believe they let you sell Obama cookies here! Tsk!
Employee: Ma’am, those are just gingerbread cookies.

—

Whiny three-year-old: Mom! I’m hungry! I’m huuuungryyyyy!
Mother (calmly, without missing a beat): Well, you should probably shut up.

—

Emo boy: Matt! Tell her how you fucked up your face!
Matt: I was rubbing one out in the shower and when I came, my knees gave out and I hit my head on the faucet.
Emo girl (gasping and laughing hysterically): That is best thing I have ever heard!

—

Drunk lesbian to sober girlfriend: Aw, I wanna puke but I can’t!
Sober girlfriend: I would punch you in the stomach if you wanted …that’s how much I love you.
Drunk lesbian: Awww, that’s sweet.

—

Drunk girl looking at digital camera: Sometimes I’m having such a good time I look Chinese.

—

I hope you’ve all had a laugh from that.

On a side note, you might have noticed I’ve changed the theme of my blog. It took me ages to decide on one I liked. I know that having a lot of writing on an inverse background (that is, black background, white writing) is not good and people tend to not read that, but I’ll take my chances. And besides now I have to not write too much, in case people stop reading.

And, since we’re on the topic of changes, I’ve adopted Vania and Julia’s habit of replying a comment within the comment. So if you think that I’m simply not replying you anymore, because you don’t see an increase in comment count, that’s not true; check into your comment.

Keep Cool (and stay looking Chinese)

D.F.

If only…

If it weren’t for the extra NON-COMPULSORY Chinese homework, I would have just finished ALL of my holidays homework, bar printing out and sticking on.

I realized that I do homework and study better when my parents are NOT around to supervise. When they are around, I’d do maybe 3 maths questions before giving up and setting it aside. But today, they both went out to the city to meet a friend and celebrate Chinese New Year, and I went and finished 3 exercises in Maths without taking a single break (even to pee. That was a small mistake. I’ll pee next time).

Anyway, I’m just wondering on how to break it to them.

“I’m sorry, it’s not you, it’s me. Well, I guess it is you. But I don’t know why! I’m just as confused as you are.”

“We just can’t be together when studying is involved. I think it’s better for the both of us.”

“Look, I’m gonna be home late. I got a lot of studying to do. Don’t wait up.”

“I’m studying with someone else.”

Happy CNY to all you Asians, and Aussie Day to all you Aussies. I don’t know, either the shit can really go down with the racist things, or we might have one of the best CNY/AD ever because everyone would just be partying.

新年快乐

Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oi Oi Oi!

Yeah…

Keep Cool (and studying hard. All. Night. Long.)

D.F.

A.Ha.I.Told.You.

I feel bad to gloat but I seriously KNEW something like this was gonna happen and now I want to KILL HIM for making it come true! What a dickhead.

I had a pretty good day today. I met a cool chick called Carmen in my Chinese class (newcomer) and she was quite nice and easy to get along with. I felt bad though, because I didn’t talk to Ev- nor Mi- much and I think they felt neglected (as much as Ev- tried to assure me otherwise.) but next week I will make it up to them.

No idea how but maybe my presence alone is enough. Oh how narcissistic of me.

How fitting, don’t you think? Down to the scale, too!

Not much to write about today. Just the gloat, the negligence (sounds like my Legal project, WHICH I STILL HAVEN’T STARTED!) and the book.

Oh, and I said this, but…

Eunice, Carmaine, Bee, it will almost tangibly hurts me to think about how amazing, stunning (lol not slutty) and BEAUTIFUL you three will look for the formal, and to realize I can’t see you in person. (Yes I know what a stupid thing to say, why don’t I just come?? No…) So you must promise to take a LOT of photographs. I will miss you that night. It will feel like I’ve left a good half of me somewhere else.

But, but but, Sonam, Vania, don’t get too mad, I will have fun with you guys too! Wow how awkward…

De Fluffe, Out.

P.S. Can you guess yet?