Tracing letters along my back

Today Annie and I went to the uni library again to do research for our final essay. We thought it would be straightforward like it was for Asian PR, which we did a week prior.

It wasn’t.

We didn’t realize it when picking the topic, but the ambiguity of our research question drove us to near madness. We shuffled through the pages of our books hoping that something would jump out at us, or the jumble of quotes that we were slowly compiling would fall into some sort of essay structure.

Thank my stars Mela came just in time. She sat with me and calmed me down when I had my – and I never have these – attack of pure hopelessness. And it was a good thing she was there to do so, because otherwise I think I would have taken it out on Annie to the point where we would have had a massive fight.

While I was buried in my book and trying to make sense of the confusing language, Mela was watching a movie – tactfully turned away from me – and tracing abstract shapes and letters on my back. I don’t know if in her past this had worked, but I sure never told her that this was something my grandma used to do to lull me to sleep when I was very young. It calmed me down a lot and made me feel a bit better about my situation.

Sure, if I think about how much time I have left compared to the workload, I get scared again. But I’ve seen my ability to write even the most confusing and unresearched essay in a short period of time before. I’ve done the maths – I know that I just need to pass these essays to pass those classes, and even though that’s not the kind of mark that would make my parents happy, these are difficult and dry classes, and I doubt anyone would be having a good time in them.

I took a long hot shower when I got home. My skin reacted slightly to Mela’s sunscreen, so I let it soak a bit in the warm water. It feels better now, but it’s still a bit flaky.

I am going to go take some more notes before going to bed for a good solid sleep before doing as much as I can tomorrow.

And I love Mela, so very much. Not just because she came into the city today just to sit with Annie and me while we freaked out. Not just because she let me squeeze her hand whenever I felt overwhelmed. Not just because, even though she felt a bit ill, she still agreed to stay out a bit late. Mostly because she did these things willingly even when I didn’t realize the inconvenience it placed onto her, and never voiced my guilt when I did realize. Mostly because she looked into my eyes when I was going to just give up on the essay, and told me that I’ll be fine.

Alex.

My Lungs Refuse To Breathe The Air Without You Here

[Without You Here – Pensive]

Hello Winter! Hello another 3 months of song titles.

Yesterday I went to dinner with April, Simon, Oli- (April and Soph’s older bro) Soph, Erh-, Kud, Andrew and DANI!!! (Left the best part ’til last.) Yep, Dani was in Melbourne, so we all went to dinner.

We went to Sante’s at Crown, which I realized upon getting there that I’d actually gone there before, for Gina’s birthday back in Yr 9 or 10. I was immediately relieved that my starving myself earlier in the day paid off because Sante’s is an all-you-can-eat buffet!

Dani gave me this really really awesome book which is titled The Ants Are My Friends, by Martin Toseland. It’s about “misheard lyrics, malapropisms, eggcorns and other linguistic gaffes”.

And we laughed and laughed and laughed at just about everything. Dani, Andrew and Kud were finding it hard to eat their fill because they had a huge lunch.

April ate food!

I had a huge plate (with lots of coleslaw haha) and then I ate a 2nd serving…OF PRAWN CRACKERS! Let me tell you now, Prawn Crackers with mint sauce is a-may-zing.

Also, I discovered crackling pork through Soph. I like it, but I think it’s really fatty so I didn’t have more.

On the train home, I introduced Wutinie to Fruit Ninja and suffice to say, they are hooked. Dani and I (unsuccessfully) tried out hand at Sudoku and Crossword. I used to think I get words fast at the Word Scramble, but that was before I had to go head-to-head with April. Crazy April.

So far I’ve finished 2 out of my 4 subjects. Now I have to start on my two 2000-word-essays. I dread it.

I hope to visit Canberra this winter. Hope. Hooooope.

Alex.

Indeed Beast-Like

I’m starting to want to go back to using song titles. Maybe I will do that starting Tuesday, seeing as it’s the start of Winter!

Today I finished 750 words in my Travel Piece, pretty much rewrote a whole draft of my 750-word-OpEd, redrafted a 500 word Magazine profile, and at the end I figured I have earned an evening off. Tomorrow, before I go out to dinner with DANI I’m going to finish off the 300 words of the PR, and probably redraft my PNA. Still putting off those 2 horrid research essays.

I’m rather proud of myself today, actually. I have proven yet again that when I am put under stress I can work like a beast.

I would go into a huge argument with a guy who I’d met recently at Uni, and having read his blog we started a huge argument about the usefulness of Facebook events, the effort people make into charitable causes, rah rah rah, but the argument is still ongoing and if I present just my side of the argument I’m going to sound stupid and if I present both side it’s going to take too long.

Wish me luck on my remaining 9 days!

Alex

Winners Of The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

This is again, a handout from my Creative Writing tute this Friday (the last one). I’m going to miss these little things I get given.

So the handout came with a URL, which I suppose is where all the info is from.

Anyway, this is the introduction, as it is on my handout:

Since 1982 the English Department at San Jose State University has sponsored the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, a whimsical literary competition that challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels. The contest (hereafter referred to as the BLFC) was the brainchild (or Rosemary’s baby) of Professor Scott Rice, whose graduate school excavations unearthed the source of the line “It was a dark and stormy night.”

I won’t write it all up, but I will show you some of my favorites (I think they’re meant to be so ridiculous that they’re funny):

The countdown had stalled at T minus 69 seconds when Desiree, the first female ape to go up in space, winked at me slyly and pouted her thick, rubbery lips unmistakably – the first of many such advances during what would prove to be the longest, and most memorable, space voyage of my career. – Martha Simpson, Glastonbury, Connecticut (1985 winner)

The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and pleasant for those who hadn’t heard the scream at all, but not calm or balmy or even very nice for those who did hear the scream, discounting the little period of time during the actual scream itself when your ears might have been hearing it but your brain wasn’t reacting yet to let you know. – Patricia E. Presutti, Lewiston, New York (1986 winner)

“Ace, watch your head!” hissed Wanda urgently, yet somehow provocatively, through red, full, sensuous lips, but he couldn’t you know, since nobody can actually watch more than part of his nose or a little cheek or lips of he really tries, but he appreciated her warning. – Janice Estey, Aspen, Colorado (1996 winner)

The moment he laid eyes on the lifeless body of the nude socialite sprawled across the bathroom floor, Detective Leary knew she had committed suicide by grasping the cap on the tamper-proof bottle, pushing down and twisting while she kept your thumb firmly pressed against the spot the arrow pointed to, until she hit the exact spot where the tab clicks into place, allowing her to remove the cap and swallow the entire contents of the bottle, thus ending her life. – Artie Kalemeris, Fairfax, Virginia (1997 winner)

They had but one last remaining night together, so they embraced each other as tight as that two-flavor entwined string cheese that is orange and yellowish-white, the orange probably being a bland Cheddar and the white…Mozzarella, although it could possibly be Provolone or just plain American, as it really doesn’t taste distinctly dissimilar from the orange, yet they would have you believe it does by coloring it differently.  -Mariann Simms, Wetumpka, Alabama (2003 winner)

So I tried my hand at my own “horrible” fiction starts:

The first time I met him he’d run at me with uncontainable joy, his silky golden locks bouncing on his teddy-bear-like body with the same enthusiasm as that of a fat man’s bosoms. His tongue smeared my cheek with the fury of a fully-paid carwash service, attempting to encase me wholly, to the last inch of my life, in his warm saliva. His breath was on my ear, toasty like a dog’s – which was fitting, was because he was indeed a compact little Maltese Cross.

I’m in my Day 1 of my 11 Days of Writing Hell. So far I’ve finished 1 essay, and I will attempt to redraft and finish off my entire short fiction piece, thus finishing 1/4 subjects, by dinner tonight.

Alex.

2 Weeks

My net uncapped!

But because for the next 2 weeks I have all my final essays to write, this is what I shall do:

Today: Watch 1 ep of NCIS from last week while nomming on coleslaw, then finish my Cinema Studies ACMI close analysis essay.

Then watch 1 ep of GLEE from last week, and then finish editing both my close analysis and my Creative Writing short fiction.

Then watch 1 ep of How I Met Your Mother from last week, and then start violently on my “Travel Piece” for Professional writing. Write at least 200 words.

Then watch 1 ep of The Big Bang Theory from last week, and then write another 200 words of Travel Piece.

That’s it for today. Tomorrow I might be going out but tomorrow I aim to finish the Travel Piece, as well as the episodes of House and FlashForward from last week.

This month I aim to not download anything until the end of the month. I also figured that Megavideo streaming uses less downloads than those from, say, Zshare, so I will try my best to cope with the time limit on Megavideo.

I don’t know how I would cope with not getting new Glee songs.

I shall edit this piece later tonight to tell you if I managed to do this.

Alex.

/edit I finished Cinema Studies and I remembered that the Creative Writing piece can be workshopped on Friday so I don’t have to worry. Other than that I haven’t started on my Travel piece but I will bring a notebook to the city tomorrow and start writing it.

I Wear This Cap Unwillingly

Oh ffs I’m capped again. I do not know why! Maybe it’s Skype.

Oh dude I really can’t do with the cappage again! Especially now with all my essays due. Not happy.

To read about what I did today, go to day 11 of my 365.

I know it is ratty of me to do that but typing it all out again seems pointless and what I did today felt a bit trivial for this blog.

I will mention though that I spent some awesome time with Catherine and Jackie today!

Wish me luck writing and researching with a capped net!

Alex.

Count

Number of exams done so far:

2

Number of exams to go:

5

Number of minutes I had to write my language analysis:

40

Number of times I made the joke “I did that anal so hard the table shook”

20 (or more…probably more)

Number of people I plan to praise me today:

10

Number of people I’ve already asked

3

I’ll keep the count going for the next 3 weeks.

Alex.

P.S.

Number of snails I nearly stepped on today while walking home:

8

Who’s the eco-friendly bitch? Me. Why were they in the middle of the path anyway?! STAY ON THE GRASS!

Also

Number of times the thought crossed my mind that if I tag this heavily with VCE English etc, I’ll get the George Clooney rush again:

4