I’d eat a crazy wing for ya

Today was Mela and my 2 month anniversary. For our 1st month I went to her house because she got food poisoning the night before. That time we cuddled up and watched movies under her blankets. Today we went out.

She had work in the afternoon, so I caught up with her in the last hour of her shift. I watched her stand behind the counter, not yet in her uniform, putting through game returns and trades. She was so small next to her two large manly coworkers.

We had a quick (McDonalds) lunch – it was McHappy Day we felt obliged – and took the bus up to Chadstone. We were both in very loving moods – after all, the past 2 months felt like a breezy dream, surely the next few would be just as easy!

We went perfume shopping, as she’d already bought me the entire series of Slam Dunk on DVD, and she really wants to try a new fragrance. We went around Myers spraying many many different bottles to find the perfect one, and after a good half hour or so, it was a toss up between DKNY Pure or DKNY Gold Delicious. We sprayed both on her neck, one on each side, and after letting it soak in for a while, we realized that Mela’s natural scent masked DKNY Pure too much. She seemed very happy with her present, and I was glad that at least this month I don’t have to worry about failing as a good girlfriend.

(Also, I know how our presents reflect the man/woman dichotomy. I did come across this Ralph Lauren one which I REALLY liked but it made her gag and feel nauseous so.)

Afterwards, we were going to eat at this Chinese restaurant, but the center was closing, so we had to go to Glenny. On the bus back, I remembered that Crazy Wing should have opened at Glenny, so instead of going to La Porchetta as we’d originally planned (because she’s never been and, it seems, still hasn’t been), we went to Crazy Wing. She was brave enough to want to eat two Crazy Wings by herself, but it seemed that the Glen Waverley branch uses much spicier mix than the one in the city, because she started tearing up badly, and when I tried to eat some for her, I was knocked over too.

I was so badly affected, in fact, that about 10 minutes after eating that, I started getting serious stomach cramps. I had to sit there and look like I was dying for about 10 more minutes, making Mela very worried about me. In the end we shook on it – we will never have Crazy Wing again, we’d only order their Spicy Honey or maybe a degree or two hotter, but never that. I also vowed to ban my dad from ever trying it – he has high blood pressure, and me eating it tonight made my ears pop with all the increased blood flow. It was bad.

Finally, after settling my stomach, we slowly walked back to the bus stop. On the bus, I sat by the window and saw her still waiting for her bus, so we texted each other from maybe 2 meters away. Ahhh the disgusting that is us.

Happy 2 months baby!

Alex.

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It Was A Fun Day, It Was A Fail Day, It Was A Ducking Fantastic Day

That was a long title.

Today, instead of going to singing rehearsals (which I think now that I think about it, I was actually aware of last week, then forgot about until last night) I went out with Katherine again. We went to the city to “research” webcams, speakers etc. Also, I had to run errands.

Got to the Glen uber early because I couldn’t be bothered catching a bus so got mom to drop me off as she went to work, meaning I waited around at Maccas using their free wifi for about an hour. Got the 10:11 train, and Katherine got on at Mt Waverley. This doesn’t sound exciting. It isn’t.

Got to Melbourne Central and needed to pee. Then got Caramellatte. Still isn’t that exciting.

(What WAS funny, however, as right before I went into the bathroom I told Katherine to “stay here” and the look she gave me could only be described as “oh-no-you-didn’t-just-treat-me-like-your-dog”.)

So first of all we went to Myer to look at speakers. It took ages to find the entertainment section because we had to go down down down down.

Katherine also looked at cameras because she wants a DSLR. Anyone gonna help her out? Didn’t think so.

By the way, and this has been bugging me all day; to my friends: do any of you use Versace New Woman? Because Katherine was wearing it, and I SWEAR I know someone else who wears it but I cannot for my LIFE remember who. It would, I assume, be someone who I get close enough to smell. Just ignore how ducking perverted I sound right now.

I think that’s the bottle. Google does tend to duck with me sometimes.

Then we left Melbourne Central and went to Bourke St to head for JB. We went into Target first, and got lost. I told her to “ask the Asian chick!” but she refused to. “We can find it ourselves!” “You’re such a guy!” “What?!” “Guys never ask for directions.” “FINE I’ll ask the Asian chick!”

Then we got out of Target and went into JB. This is gripping stuff this is.

We saw the speakers that she wanted. Z4 or something? She gasped. Then saw the pricetag. She gasped again.

Well, at this point (and I just consulted Katherine who also has “NO idea”) I forgot the chain of events, so I’ll just throw in stuff that happened and hopefully the universe doesn’t collapse into itself in a mess of chronological mess.

Mess of…chronological…mess. I need to sleep.

At some point we traversed Russel St. We walked around in the shade (thank you vampirism). We walked a hell of a lot. We went to the Dirt Cheap Books store. Haha. Ha. I made Katherine look at a book about sex or something naughty starting with S. I found it funny. She found it fit to simply walk away from me. I tried calling her name but to no avail. I contemplated using the tried-and-true “MARCO POLO” tactic but felt it not emergency enough.

At some other point I took Katherine to the “secret shop” that Eunice once showed me except she’s been there before with another Alex. We looked at PostSecret books and random books. She found this book called “Wreck This Journal”. At the back of the book, it says “tape this book together, and mail it to yourself!” I think I might actually mail it to her.

At some other point we traversed Elizabeth St. That was painful on my feet too. We walked into a lot of electronic stores. Most of the time I just whinged about how Katherine doesn’t watch FRIENDS, and never has.

(I started marathon-ing Season 2 of FRIENDS again last night. I gotta say that summer when I marathon-ed it all was such a wonderful summer. Michelle, can I borrow all of them again?)

At some yet other point we ate lunch. Had an interesting conversation at lunch. It was interesting because I made Katherine talk and eat. You know she doesn’t do either in public right? Apparently she doesn’t sing in public either. I mean. Who doesn’t or hasn’t once sung in public?

At some yet other other point I ran my errand. We went to National Geographic and I got Eunice her Sea Monkeys.

At some fail point I started going up in the down escalators because my brain said, “No one is going to that one, it’s empty!”

Finally, we were bushed. We were so bushed we decided to find a place to sit down except the downstairs foodcourt at Melb Central was too hot and one of the good couches upstairs was taking by a really PDA couple (there was a lot of space next to them – they were REALLY PDA – but yeah we thought it would be WAY awkward to go sit with them).

So we went down to the Basement and found a couch to crash on. Listened to Katherine’s iPod. Then this group of guys came down and sat on the couch next to us and it was majorly awkward turtle ‘cos we just basically sat still and pretended we weren’t there. Then they left. So we had the gummy people I bought her, and I made her drop one in my mouth except she missed (I swear, oh my god, my mouth was 10 cms from her hand. She missed).

At some point after that we took the train home together after I made her take Glenny with me (the guilty puppy face actually works on her. Wow.) and we tried to solve the Sudoku except I ducked it up. Then we were doing the crossword, and 16-across was “Ass-like”. I wrote “Katherine” next to it.

I guess I can’t be bothered explaining the huge in-joke behind that except just simple to direct you towards “My Humps” by the Black Eyed Peas.

There was a clue that was “seize”. So far we had _rap___ and at the same time both of us wondered out loud, “Crapture?”

After she left I was sending her a text and I tried to write the f word except it came out as “duck”. I think that’s how I’m going to swear as from now on.

Well, I was aiming for 1000 words and I hit it.

Alex.

P.S. Apparently singing rehearsals sucked. Yay. (Annie…Annie…ah duck it)

P.P.S. 14 days ’til Sorrento!