Haven’t seen you in a while

Today on the tram ride to Flinders, as a joke, when I sat down next to Jen I pretended that I hadn’t seen her in a while.

“Oh hey! It’s been a while, how’ve you been?” said I.

“I’ve been well,” said Jen.

“Yeah? Katie’s grown up a bit now hasn’t she? How’s she doing?”

“She’s great. Yeah she’s 17 this year.” (Which is of course the same age as Jen currently)

“How’s Tommy?”

“(Tommy’s a crap name.)”

“(YOU’RE the mom.)”

“Tommy’s good. He starts kindergarten next year.”

“Oh wow he sure grew up fast. I still remember when he was this little.”

“Yeah, and Bindi’s 21.”

“Oh wow, must be a handful.”

“Hey you goin’ to the reunion next month?”

“Yeah, the 30th right?”

“(Wow that makes Tommy have a really old mom.)”

“20th? (No that means you had Bindi when you were in Yr 12. 25th, then.) Yeah 25th Reunion. Wow it’s been ages since I’ve seen Julia…”

“And SONAM! Yeah oh did you hear Jen T- is now the…”

“President of China?”

“Yeah and plus she discovered a cure for cancer.”

“And April…well we have to call her Senator Scarlett now. (No wait, you can’t be a Senator if you’re not born in America.)”

…

And so it went on.

The looks we got.

Alex.

GAT 09 – George Clooney

Before I say anything else, please read this very short The Age article online:

George Clooney The Answer for VCE Pranksters

This way I don’t have to explain it all.

So, yes, in summary, I did include George Clooney into my GAT. I was tempted to include it into the informative piece, where I was writing about the lifespan and functions of the worker bee, and how in its “Golden Years” – much like George Clooney is now…but no I decided it would only be wise to include it in the opinion section.

The opinion section was about possessions. So:

“…to have possessions would make people happy. And happiness is an individual thing. Some people may be happy with what little they have, such as George Clooney and his Nespresso coffees…”

“…sure, possessions lessen our appreciation for traditional things, as was George Clooney’s appreciation of fine women for instant coffee shots…”

And I only thought about this one after I finished it:

“…possessions make us happy. Just like if one was to possess George Clooney.”

Now, as you may have read, VCAA did not say if they would mark down those who mention Clooney. But hey I think if they do, that’s just a reflection of their stupid conservative ways, and absolute rigidity. Here, we finally have all the students uniting to be CREATIVE in such a boring assessment, and actually looking FORWARD to sitting the GAT, and what do you do? You reward them by marking them down. Bad children, who taught you to be creative and find fun in life? You MUST do things as we tell you and be stuck in the mould we’ve set.

Well, we’ll see what happens. I’m pretty sure if they (VCAA) marked this down the students would all revolt. After all, as long as it was relevant, it’s like marking someone down for using black pen instead of blue.

I finished the thing an hour early. Had time for a Maccas run.

Alex.

Chicken, cream, sticker

Last night we got a phone call from a family friend. They raised a couple of chickens as pets except one of them turned out to be a rooster (cos you can’t tell when they’re chickies). The rooster’s crowing a lot which is pissing their neighbors off, so we got a call from the guy, who was somehow under the impression that my dad can “do something about it”.

Well, he can’t, but we got the rooster anyway.

So last night the rooster slept in the cardboard box it came in, because it would squeeze under the gate otherwise or something, and run off, and there’s one rooster gone to waste. We fed it some rice grains and water this morning, and put it in the shade so that we don’t get roast chicken before it’s plucked, if you get me.

Anyway, dad can’t actually do anything about it, which is a dead pity because I’d wanted to see him try, and take pictures. That’s the difference between Carmaine and me, I suppose. Carmaine takes pictures of nice events, pretty people and clothes and scenery and momentos, and I like taking pictures of things being “taken care of”.

So dad called up another family friend who actually does know how to “take care” of a chicken. Its going over to their place in about an hour. I took a look at the rooster this morning (it had a sort of confused crow this morning. Sort of like “cock-a-doodle? Cock-a-wtf-is-this-box?”) and it was really really really robust rooster, shiny feathers and strong round body. Pity we won’t get to eat it. I was actually really looking forward to having it. Carmaine looked at me funny when I mentioned that thought.

Tomorrow is Julia’s birthday, so today at recess we had cake for her (and sang happy birthday AGAIN heaps of times AGAIN) and there was this really really large and (stealing Carmaine’s phrase here) orgasmically delicious cake. We couldn’t finish it all, so we brought it into Form. Theresa then proceeded to pretend to come hug me but instead wipe cream on my nose.

And finally, I came across Carmaine going to her locker during her Chem double, and so we chatted a bit, and as she turned around to her locker, I saw a sticker on her back and couldn’t stop laughing. Being a good friend, I ripped it off for her. It said “LOSER”.

And those were the 3 fun things that happened today.

Alex.

P.S. I went to see Serpless. She wasn’t there. I won’t go to Baldock until I’ve seen Serpless. Seems logical that way. I’m taking control again, Bianca. Sort of.

OOOH OOOH OOOH cont’d

Ah, so where did I leave off?

Right, Eunice and I had just watched Nereids’ rehearsal.

So, we went to Maccas and came back to school to eat with NicJing, Kris-, Bald Bec (I’m not being mean; she’d shaved her head for charity) and some other people. We made jokes about Kris-‘s industrial sized tub of food. Well, it was a really large tub, the kind that would feed a family of 8 for a day, and she was eating it for dinner. It was amazing that she’d downed 3/4 of the thing already.

Finally, went up to the House Room (ie a heavily crepe-paper-and-ballooned-science-room) and sort of walked around a bit in there, watching the cast members put makeup on each other. I commented that you could tell the front half of the room was artsy cast people, as they were all off their heads shouting and makeup and hairspray etc etc, and the back half of the room were the orchestra people, dressed conservatively in black, quietly cradling a ‘cello or sucking on a Chupa Chup.

Then, Chorus was called for a last minute rehearsal. Chorus, for those who are not familiar with Greek plays, are a large bunch of people who stand off to the side of the main stage, and they sort of act/interact with the play. So, if something shocking happens, the Chorus would gasp. If there is a song, the Chorus might sing along.

Avs and Millie took the Chorus, a crowd of maybe 30-odd girls, out behind the gym. By this time, dusk had well settled in. Well, dusk was about to get a very loud show.

Suse had gone with me out of curiosity to see how Chorus would rehearse. Avs and Millie told the entire Chorus to back, back, back into the oval. They themselves took 15 paces back, until they were roughly 100 meters apart, across the grass from each other (my perception of distance is somewhat shite. Maybe it was 50 meters). Then, Avs said, “IF YOU DON’T SHOUT, I WON’T BE ABLE TO HEAR YOU! SO BE LOUD!” (as Chorus don’t have microphones, to be heard in the hall they’d have to be loud).

Then, they proceeded to rehearse and show me the funniest part of the night.

One of their lines were cued by Enrique’s “I CAN BE YOUR HERO BABY!” to which they all chorus “OOOH OOOH OOOH” as backups. So, Avs and Millie at one end of the oval, screamed their cue, and like 30-odd angels of hell, the Chorus hooted “OOOH OOOH OOOH!” into the appalled dusk (and much to my continued amusement). After the 1st time, where I fell down onto the ground in laughter, they did it again. A cyclist going home passed just as the 2nd round of hearty yet haunting “OOOH OOOH OOOH” pierced into the terrified atmosphere, and he – the cyclist – turned his head around in a sort of “WHAT IN THE NAME OF FUCK WAS THAT?!”

I watched them go through Bohemian Rhapsody, which the Chorus did well in, but of course Avs and Millie had to give them their cues. They didn’t know the lyrics, so they sort of did a combination of drums/electric guitar/dananana in a hectic harmony. I suppose words aren’t good enough to describe how insanely funny that was to witness.

Suse and I went back to the House Room, and then Nat provided me with the 2nd funniest moment of the night.

For some odd reason, Nat stood next to me and pointed off into the distance. She’d done that thing where you look off into the distance and get someone else to look at what you’re looking at (that is, nothing). So, Nat and I decided to prank a few more people, and flagged down whomever we recognised as they passed us. We pointed out the window, “SEE? Oh my god see that? It’s so awesome! Look! Can’t you see it?” Most of our victims tweaked after a while and walked away shaking their heads, but Fatty Tran (merely a nickname to censor her name; she is by no means fat) was so excited to see this “AWESOME THING! JUST PAST THAT FORK IN THE TREE!” that she even put on her glasses and consented to making binoculars out of her hands and turning her head to the side, which is the “best way you can see it!”

Right before our performance, we all went back behind the gym (furthest from the hall, so if we made noise it’s okay) and did a warm up. We, as a house, stood in a misshaped circle and shouted the “Hokey Pokey”, shaking all our limbs as well as our bodies, and generally making a very weird cult-like presence. All warmed up, we realized we were a bit late to go onstage, and hurried into the hall.

So, showtime. Got the laughs we wanted, and Fel did fantastically conducting us, especially in Bohemian Rhapsody (the time change just before “he’s just a poor boy”).

Afterwards, we said bye to Eunice and Fel, Bee and I went home, driven by Fel’s dad. Slept at 11 and could barely force my eyelids open this morning. I went to Dani’s place in the morning and while she was getting ready Andrew and I watched Dracula. It. Was. Cool. I want to see it all now.

And that, was most of yesterday and this morning.

Now, I will go watch Ghost Whisperer. Will Jim/Sam remember Melinda? Haha.

Alex.