Moonlight Would Provide The Spark

[Three Cheers For Five Years – Mayday Parade]

Serena brought it to my attention that I never finished this post.

As this was two years ago and I’m not bothered enough to check back, I’ll do them all now. I actually have a post in draft for the last few days that I didn’t write, but since I have to sleep within the hour, this might be faster.

Day 01: Your views on death, how you cope, etc. – If I answered this already, forgive me. I guess my answer will be different now. Since then, I’ve come across two deaths, one close but not extremely close to me, and another in my own family. Both were very sad but not in the shock tragic way. The former is definitely very upsetting, since it was my friend who battled cancer for eight years, and who ultimately lost to it. The thing is, the whole family knew it was coming, so they had time to prepare, to spend time and to smile and laugh. Her last days were spent in the company of her friends and family, so all things considered, it was pretty beautiful. The second death was my own grandfather, and it was a bit of a shock, but he was old, he lived a full, happy life, and there were no prolonged pain and suffering. He left my grandmother with a place to live, money to spend, and they had a lifetime of memories together. So my views? Death sucks, obviously, since it’s the ending of an existence, but I’d prefer to think about them when they lived, and how good they lived, and in that way they can continue existing in a sense, and positively so.

Day 02: How you introduce yourself to new people. – I try to be myself, but for the most part I gauge the situation. It’s easy to create a public persona, a funny, slightly inappropriate jokey, kind of persona, and just let that take care of the social conventions. But let’s be honest, we all do that. It’s how society is made for us to survive in, and instead of condemning it, think about the kind of people in your life around whom you could drop your public persona easily. It makes times with them even more special.

Day 03: What you think about love. – Judging by the time stamp, this was initially written just before I met Amelia. June 2011, I was pretty into someone else, and it wasn’t requited. I would have been a bit naive, hopeful but ultimately cynical about it. Now, I think it’s probably at the stage where I think love is definitely something which can fix someone, but also an elusive something which you may never know you’ve had, because who knows what love is? How can you tell you’re in love, and not just deep infatuation? And more importantly: does it matter? If you’re happy, and they’re happy, and your sex drive is VERY happy, then does it matter if it’s not really “love”?

Day 04: Write about someone you love. – Please see previous posts about Amelia. SORRY I just have to sleep very soon.

Day 05: A list of things you fancy doing. – Lately, I’ve been working more, so I do appreciate down times when I can read a good comic or book, or watch some shows while playing Jetpack Joyride, or reading about cool new techie things. I also really, really enjoy cuddling Amelia’s dog Meg.

MEG3

Day 06: Recommend some books to read. – This might just show my immaturity and taste in literature, but a few books I’ve been recently reading that I really enjoyed:

Perfume – the Story of A Murderer by Patrick Suskind (yes, I saw the movie first)

A Song of Ice and Fire (the series Game of Thrones is based off of) by G. R. R. Martin

Repotting Harry Potter – A Professor’s Book-by-Book Guide for the Serious Re-Reader by James W. Thomas (a wonderful way to also read through the series itself as you go along)

The Casual Vacancy (Where Rowling shows she really, really understands how people work) by J. K. Rowling

White Fang (literally one of the first adult English books I ever read, and I fell in love with it) by Jack London.

I’m also going to recommend some comics which I like.

Saga – Image Comics. The illustration is astonishingly beautiful, and Fiona Staples conveys emotions so artfully that some panels are laugh out loud funny, because of the way she’d draw the characters. The story is also compelling, but now that I’m waiting monthly for them instead of consuming them in one go, I feel like it’s so slow!

Chew – Image Comics. I have a thing for Image. Chew is funny and then punch-you-in-the-guts heartbreaking without notice. It takes quite a lighthearted approach at a really, really morbid theme, and it’s so fun to see where everything is headed.

Rising Stars – Image Comics. This series ended a while back, and I blew through it in one day. I’d wanted to savor it slowly, but before I knew it, it was pitch black and I had a sore butt, but I was just sobbing at how things turned out. It’s like Heroes, but better (which isn’t saying much, I guess).

American Vampire – Vertigo. Ever since reading Preacher (which is also good, but I won’t put it on my list), I thought Vertigo would come out with weird-ass things (just like Hellblazer too), but American Vampire’s story really SUCKED me in, even considering the fact that it had time jumps and deviations in protagonist focus. The world which Snyder created is so engrossing I wish they could make a bigger thing of it.

Fables – Vertigo. Also a surprisingly not weird series. It’s like Once Upon A Time but not so whiney. The reason I got into it was because I read a review for Wolf Among Us, which is the Telltale Game’s prequel to Fables. The game sounded fun, and the comics did too, so I gave it a go. Great decision, cannot wait for the game now.

Numbercruncher – Titan Comics. This was one of those random new comics recommended by Comixology, and I gave it a go. It was strange to start with but then the premise really grabbed me, then it continued being extremely awesome, and it’s something I’d totally re-read slowly while contemplating the idea behind it.

The Bunker – Hoarse and Buggy Productions. Yet another random digital-only recommendation, which turned out to be very time-travelly mind-bendy stuff. It’s slow in picking up and just started, so it’s not built up to much yet, but the creators are promising something huge, and I hope they deliver!

Day 07: Write about the arts (music, art, dancing). – Obviously, these things are all around us and we don’t realize it. It feels like these institutions have been built to such an elitist state that, if you’re not AMAZING AND TOTALLY ACE at it, then you’re relegated to “sucking” and “keep it as your hobby”. I mean, for most people, it probably is a hobby anyway, but they don’t need you to tell them that. I wish I was good at all three, because musicians/artists/dancers are sexy, but I think I’m okay with just writing and storytelling.

Day 08: Write a poem. – I once took a creative writing class where one of the assessments was to write a poem. I think poems are also built to be something more than it needs to be. Poems are meant to be a gathering of words in a way which draws beauty and instills thought and emotions into the reader. Just because you didn’t write it in a bloody sonnet format doesn’t make it any less special. A limerick isn’t any lesser than a haiku. A kid who wrote an acrostic poem using the word “MOMMY” and writing about how much they love their mother means a lot more to that mother than anything Hemingway could have come up with, because poetry isn’t about how poncy you are, it’s about the emotion behind it. In other words, I can’t really be bothered writing one right now.
Day 09: Photo of your favorite pillow. – I only have one pillow, and it’s light blue. Unless you want a photo of Meg again?

Day 10: How you wake up in the morning. – I tend to wake up more often to alarm clocks than not, then I take 10 minutes to scroll through my overnight Twitter feed, especially for interesting news, then I get up and do my stuff.
Day 11: Write about your sibling(s) or what it’s like to be an only child. – Being an only child can be lonely sometimes, and also your parents pressure you a lot, since they only have you to make them proud. But, you get lots of stuff, so whatevs, right? It’s getting late and these questions ask too much of me!
Day 12: Your relationship with your parents. – I think this is a bunch of worms which need to remain in the can for tonight.
Day 13: Write about what you believe in, be it God, yourself, etc. – I believe in finding happiness, and one’s innate right to be happy, no matter how. Of course, if being happy means you absolutely need to go on a killing rampage, then maybe you shouldn’t be happy, or even alive. I’m not really one for all-life-is-sacred, because in the end we have about 6 billion on this planet, (I’m the only one with the uncanny ability to be awesome,) about half of them is in a constant state of poverty and probably dying, and the other half cares that a deranged gunman not get a death sentence? Again, let’s keep those worms for another day. My point is, being happy is all you should aim for, because once you die, who knows what else comes after?
Day 14: What you do for Valentine’s Day. – I’m not allowed to celebrate this day because Amelia hates it.
Day 15: Write about the best gift you’ve ever received. – It’s hard for me to pinpoint the best gift, since I constantly want and get tired of new things. I think that a photo album that a friend gave me when I left my old school was probably the most heartfelt and sweet thing, though.
Day 16: Write another poem, about the weather. – Roses are red, the sky is blue, the rain is gray, brown is poo.
Day 17: Post your favorite gif.

Cry3I used this reacting to when Amelia said that we were no longer in the honeymoon period.
Day 18: Your plans for tomorrow. – I work 8 hours.
Day 19: Write about something you fear. – I’m scared that Amelia will find being with me too tiresome as times goes on, because we either have to hide it from our families forever, or come out and face the consequences. We’re both bi, so I’m worried she’ll end up finding it easier just to be with a guy who she can be public with. But that’s silly, because she loves me, and her dog has basically imprinted on me so it will take too long for it to love someone else.
Day 20: What did you eat for dinner last night? – Dad fried up some Spam and we ate it with burger buns and he also made soup.
Day 21: Your favorite thing to drink. – SO I HAD MY FIRST WET PUSSY (well…”second”) TONIGHT AND IT WAS DELICIOUS AND I LOVE IT.
Day 22: How you take your coffee or tea. – I usually have a latte with one sugar, but I used to do double shots with one sugar as well. I take tea black with one sugar, unless it’s green, then no sugar.
Day 23: Your favorite thing to wear. – I like wearing hoodies because they feel like mobile blankets.
Day 24: Another poem, about the shoes you wear most often. – Roses are red, my shoes are purple, some bits are black, so black and purple.
Day 25: Write about where you live. – I live on a street predominantly white, and we used to have a problem with some kids down the road, who would ding-dong ditch us, and they escalated to kicking our trash over, harassing my mom when she’s working in the front yard, and once egged our house. They’ve stopped recently, though.
Day 26: Your favorite smell. – Amelia! Also bacon. OH IMAGINE IF AMELIA COOKED BACON!
Day 27: Your thoughts on the internet. – I don’t see a problem with the internet itself, I see a problem with people. It’s like guns. Yes, guns are bad things and they kill people, but honestly, a gun sitting there by itself wouldn’t be that scary, but you put a pair of hands on it and WOAH it’s a problem. It’s the same thing with the internet. It’s a great way to connect things that are otherwise unable to be connected, but once you put a human behind the mouse and….
Day 28: Write about how you feel today. – I’m a bit annoyed that I spent all day watching TV and not doing some writing, but it is my rest day after all, so I should just be happy I got to rest. Next week is a tough working week, but I’ve got Pokemon Y to look forward to on Saturday!

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Hooked…And Still Fishing

I am currently watching the new ep of How I Met Your Mother, and they’re discussing how a person can be the hooked, or the hooker (yes, the joke is still funny after Robin told it).

Basically, being played the hook is when someone who you like (who knows you like them) tells you, “I like you…but I just can’t be with you…RIGHT NOW.” This way, they can maintain whatever it is that they’re currently living, and yet still have that safety line to you, if they ever need it.

So my 2 questions are:

Have you ever been played the hook, or been the hooker (haha, it’s still funny the 3rd time round!)?

And

What are your thoughts on such actions? Is it justifiable to want to keep a safety line, or is just plain cruel?

Alex.

I was bored and trying to distract myself; it didn’t work

What are you listening to right now?
No Such Thing – John Mayer

Have you ever eaten sushi?
Well, according to a certain someone, I’m Asian therefore I must’ve have eaten sushi.
Yes I have.

What is bothering you?
A text I got at 2 am this morning.

Do you have somebody you can tell anything to?
I used to. I don’t know if I still do. Maybe.

Expecting something to change in the next month?
For my own sake I hope so.

What was the highlight of your day?
Today? Nothing. Yesterday? Ninja.

Do you need to say anything to someone?
Yes. They won’t listen.

Did you have a good day yesterday?
Yes.

Do you like messages or comments better?
What do you mean? Do you mean when someone comments a wall post instead of sending one themselves? I don’t really care.

The shirt you’re wearing, does anyone else have it?
Snoopy fans, yes.

Do you own a camera phone?
No. Wait yes. I don’t know. I don’t use the camera function.

Have you ever skipped school just because you were tired?
Yes.

Do you like the town you are living in?
It’s not done anything bad to me yet.

Have you ever thrown a cell phone in anger?
Yes. At the bed. I can’t afford to break it.

How many months until your birthday?
Had mine in the July just passed.

How are you feeling right now?
I’m doing this instead of Chinese. And study. You tell me.

Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?
Can’t. Have to do more Chinese that I will put off tonight.

Are you jealous of someone right now?
Yes.

Is it cute when girls kiss you on your cheek?
Lol yes?

Do you like to cuddle?
Sure.

When is your birthday?
10th July.

Is this year the best year of your life?
No.

Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn’t around now?
Yes.

Would you rather dye your hair or go tanning?
Dye.

How late did you stay up last night and why?
11. It’s not staying up.

Is it easy to annoy you?
Depends.

Is your bed comfortable?
Yes.

Is your sister a slut?
The imaginary one? No, she’s a very good role model.

Have you ever been in trouble for something you honestly didn’t do?
Yes, of course.

What/who woke you up this morning?
Dad.

Do you prefer to take your showers at night or in the morning?
Night.

Who was the last person to be in your bedroom besides you?
Probably mom when she went to grab something for me. No one really goes into my bedroom save myself.

Who is the last person you took a picture with?
Dani.

Whats one thing you’re tired of?
All this shit that seems to just seek me out.

Who means the most to you in your life right now, other than family?
I don’t know anymore.

Is there anyone you would seriously punch right now if you had the chance?
Yes.

Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?
Yes.

What do you usually do when the clock turns 11:11?
Make a wish. Or call Catherine and tell her to make a wish just to annoy her.

Who was the last person that hit you?
Carmaine.

Is there a song that every time you hear it, you think of someone?
Yes.

Can you commit to one person?
Yes.

Could you go the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?
No.

Has anyone ever said something that brought tears to your eyes?
To me or on TV? Yes, and yes.

Who is the last person you ate with?
Carmaine, Dani etc yesterday at lunch.

Do you miss anyone?
Yes.

Think back to the last person you hugged; do they mean anything to you?
Amie? Of course, she’s bloody brilliant.

Does anyone have STRONG feelings for you?
I highly doubt it.

Are you in a good mood right now?
Do I sound like I’m in a good mood?

So be honest, do you have a guy?
No.

Do you fall for people easily?
Yes.

What are you supposed to be doing right now?
Chinese, as pre mentioned.

Do you want to be in a relationship right now?
Won’t hurt.

Does anyone know your password besides you?
I think she forgot she knows.

Would you rather sing or dance in front of 100,000 people?
Sing.

Do you currently like someone who doesn’t know you exist?
Oh they know I exist.

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months without cheating?
I just said I can commit.

What is the last non-alcoholic beverage you had?
Coke Zero.

Do you laugh a lot?
Depends on mood.

Do you like to hold hands?
Yes.

What were you doing at 11 this morning?
Knox, Target, trying to find a shirt for Valedictory which I don’t even want to go to anymore.

Where will you be at 8:30 tomorrow morning?
In bed.

Is there someone you want a hug from?
Yes.

I bet you’re thinking of someone?
Of course, the moment I read that I thought of someone, it’s only natural.

When is the last time you talked to your biological father?
Assuming I am not adopted, 2 minutes ago.

What’s more important, trust or happiness?
Today, I’d say trust. Last night I’d’ve said happiness.

What shoes did you wear today?
Etnies.

Are you currently wearing a shirt with long or short sleeves?
Sweater.

Do you regret anything you’ve done this year so far?
Yes. Every year.

What usually wakes you up in the morning?
Phone.

Are you wearing short shorts?
No, I never wear short shorts except in bed.

Ever had a girl best friend?
I’d like to think so.

Who was the first person you talked to today?
Dad, “let me keep sleeping.”

If someone is doing something that pisses you off, do you tell them?
Depends on my mood. Mostly these days yes.

Will this coming up weekend be a good one?
The one I’m in right now? Not looking very good.

Do you have any piercings or tattoos?
Yes.

Are you better at remembering names or faces?
I think I’m equally good at both.

Think a lot before you go to sleep?
Yes.

Which is more romantic: sunrise or sunsets?
Both.

Are you wearing anything on your feet?
Socks and shoes.

The Coldest Heart

Let’s play a game! (I totally stole this off Am-‘s blog. Sorry.)

A few rules:

Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc, on Shuffle.

For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds.

Put any comments in brackets after the song name.

1. If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say? Umbrella – Vanilla Sky (“It’s okay, okay, okay, ay ay ay ay.”)

2. How would you describe yourself? Beautiful Lie – Ashley Parker Angel (Okay so at least it had the word “beautiful” in it.)

3. What do you like in a guy/girl? Yellow – Coldplay (“Your skin, oh yeah you skins and bones”…)

4. How do you feel today? Gone So Young – Amber Pacific (I’m not dead…)

5. What is your life’s purpose? Sleepless Nights (Never Let Her Go) – Faber Drive (Well at least the 2nd half is rather nice…)

6. What is your motto? Bubble Wrap – McFly (“This is the last time, I give up this heart of mine. “)

7. What do your friends think of you? All The Small Things – Blink 182 (Oh shut up.)

8. What do you think of your parents? I’ve Got All This Ringing In My Ears And None On My Fingers – Fall Out Boy (Ringing, yes.)

9. What do you think about very often? Whatever It Takes – Lifehouse (“I’ll do whatever it takes, it make this right.”)

10. What is 2 + 2? Hearts Burst Into Fire – Bullet For My Valentine (HAHA So true in emo world.)

11. What do you think of your best friend? Stolen – Dashboard Confessional (Hmm…”You have stolen my heart.”)

12. What do you think of the person you like? Move Along – The All-American Rejects (Haha again.)

13. What is your life story? Now Or Never – Madina Lake (Oh wow so true. “What are we waiting for? These years are dying slowly.”)

14. What do you want to be when you grow up? For You I Will (Confidence) – Teddy Geiger (Busted, I have Geiger on my iPod.)

15. What do you think of when you see the person you like? Somewhere I Belong – Linkin Park (Okay, so apart from the fact that the song is actually pretty emo, the title suits.)

16. What will you dance to at your wedding? One Last Kiss – Madina Lake (Uh oh, it’s a breakup song…)

17. What will they play at your funeral? (OMG IF BAD DAY COMES ON! …DAMN!) From The Inside – Linkin Park

18. What is your hobby/interest? Seize The Day – Avenged Sevenfold (I suppose that kind of counts as a hobby.)

19. What is your biggest fear? We Are One Tonight – Switchfoot (Oh har har. The song is NOT about sex. But har-de-fuckin’-har.)

20. What is your biggest secret? Your Guardian Angel – The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (That’s sweet.)

21. What do you think of your friends? Senorita – Justin Timberlake (Haha busted again. But isn’t that interesting.)

22. What will you post this as? The Coldest Heart – The Classic Crime

By the way:

Who would’a thought. Not my cuppa, but well neither was the movie. Yes, I watched it online. No, it was not worth the download.

Keep Cool (on the hottest day on RECORD, 46.4 degrees!)

D.F.