Sometimes I want to disappear

[Houdini – Foster the People]

I know I am almost a week late on these posts but it sort of just occurred to me I hadn’t written anything.

So, last Monday I went to see Foster the People at the Palace Theater with Amelia, who else… It just so happened that I somehow capped my incredibly large allowance of Internet because my entire family was streaming and downloading lots, so I didn’t have a way to do my timetable registering. I ended up going to Mela’s house super early to use her Internet, while getting the chance to cuddle her dog which is starting to like me quite a bit.

As usual, Portal crashed spectacularly, so in the end I got Annie to do it for me anyway, but at least I got the chance to cuddle with her a bit and play with the puppy before we realized that we were late. We were trying to move some Doctor Who episodes onto an SD card because the hotel room has a TV that can read SD cards, but in the end it took so long that we brought Mela’s laptop along anyway.

We took the train up from Ferntree Gully station, which was a, oh, 1 hour ride…and we managed to get to the city when it was getting kinda hot. We took the tram up to the Palace Theater, where around the corner our hotel stood, and we passed a girl sitting outside the doors with a book and a water bottle. “Surely,” I said, “surely she’s not waiting already? There’s still 5 hours left!” But Mela said, “why else would someone sit outside a venue?”

We went to our room, which was smaller and less luxurious than the NYE one, but came with a kitchenette and cutlery. We watched Ready Steady Cook for a bit, then went out to a late lunch. It took us a while to decide, but we ultimately decided on the new Taiwan restaurant on Swanston, which turned out quite nice. We missed out on an ice-cream parlor because we were running late on relaxing, so we’ve tucked it away in our mental to-do list. We got some cup noodles and cheeseballs which I was craving, and went back to our room with the leftover fried noodles from lunch to relax. We laid about a bit, then started watching Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood on Mela’s laptop, which I promptly became engrossed with. We started watching an episode of Doctor Who, and I didn’t realize my phone was on silent, because we missed a text from Julia saying she was lining up already. We hurried downstairs and met up with her.

To cut a long story short, I drank a lot of liquid which made me need to pee early, but I was way up front and if I left I wouldn’t be able to make it back. So we stood waiting for the opening act Last Dinosaurs for 90 minutes, and my feet were well sore before the first note was played.

During the open, this girl came up and stood behind us and started having a conversation with another girl in the middle of a song. So loudly. That I still remember that she works at the Art Center and earns 25 an hour. I ended up turning around to tell her to tone it down, at least while the song was going.

Foster was another hour away, and my bladder was really screaming. I didn’t want to leave Mela by herself up front, so I tried to stay with her as long as possible but 4 songs in I had to leave. It was so hard to get out, some people tried to push me back up front. I tried to get back again later, but the crowd was packed from the merchandise table, there was no chance 3 rows in.

Still, even from the back, I could feel the buzz of the crowd. If anything, Foster the People were good performers. Their big finale, obviously, Pumped Up Kicks, shook the place, and even at the back we were jumping.

After the gig, I was drained and unfortunately had no energy to go with Mela and Rebecca from the Wombats to Maccas, so Mela and I went back to our room. We heated up the leftover noodles and watched more FMA, then Mela ate some of the instant noodles, then felt really sick. We ended up just lying there while I rubbed her tummy, then we tentatively ate some cheeseballs and got ready for bed.

Accidentally left the air con on, so we froze if we didn’t pull up the blanket, and boiled if we did. Got up super early the next day to pack up and check out. Mela was tired and not a morning person, so I made toast and washed up. We got out just in time, and went to State Library to drop off our super heavy bags then went to Degraves for breakfast, as Mela’s never been.

We ate a full breakfast and ran into Dani who saw my check-in and called me to say she was next door. Then we walked around a bit and shopped for presents, then watched some more FMA at State before taking a train home.

So yeah, big day. Some else happened in Thursday which I will write about very soon.

Alex

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Parking Garage By The Theater

[La La Lie – Jack’s Mannequin]

So here’s a thought: when two people who used to be rather close to each other meet up again after a long hiatus – during which the relationship has been stashed away in a shoebox under the bed, then further covered by new boxes, topped off with a glazing of dust – there is always a winner and a loser (this idea was explored in How I Met Your Mother, with Robin’s Sandcastle in the Sand – yeah, one day I’ll write an original post).

They might not admit to it, but the moment they meet up again they start sizing each other up, to see who fared better in the time apart. They start comparing stories after they went their separate ways, and after mentally compiling a list of pros and cons, as unspoken as it may be, one person goes home that night feeling better about themselves – they’re in a better relationship, better job, better house, or they’re just so much sexier, whatever.

But there’s also this other scenario, where two people who used to be close sort of part ways, but they don’t lose complete contact. Through one way or another, they’re being made aware on a frequent basis the changes in the other person’s life. New friends, new job, haircuts, tans, holidays etc. So when they two of them meet up again, they sort of have a general awareness of what had gone on in the other person’s life, and thus a general awareness of who the winner is.

So I wonder, which scenario would be the better?

Personally, I find that the 2nd scenario – or what I prefer to call the We’re-Still-Friends-On-Facebook scenario – is much more painful. I mean, when I’m constantly aware of changes in the person’s life, I feel the need to constantly be at that level too (because usually I’m the one who’s being left behind. That’s my thing). So, for example, when I read updates about how one of my high-school friends got her Ps already, I was insanely jealous and went on a rampage to get more hours done – even though the situations with our families are different, and she was bound to get her Ps early anyway.

Or jobs. Oh my God I hate it when I read about how everyone’s got jobs and they’re going on road trips and I’m being unfit alone at home, writing blogs about being unfit alone at home.

I think, though, with relationships, it’s even more of a deal. I was just watching this episode of Smallville (you need to be ok with the fact that most of my blog posts are inspired by a TV show I was watching) where Lana told Clark that she’s met someone new (Ian Somerholder’s character) and she wanted him to know first.

I get that her intentions were good – let the ex hear it from her instead of someone else, since they’re “friends” and everything – but I bet there is a measure of smugness when someone does that. I mean, if I had a chance to go to my (non-existent) ex and say, “oh hey, yeah, I met someone, totally tappin’ it, just letting you know cos, I want you to hear it from me…sucker” I would grab it with both hands and try my hardest not to add “sucker” at the end, or in my tone, or on my face. Because being able to say that is like the ultimate Kill-Shot for victory (of course, further on the track if what I was “tapping” ended up being some major loser, the Counter-damage would be ten-fold).

Since I’ve established that I’m usually the one being left behind, I just feel that in this scenario, chances are I’M going to be the one scrolling through my Facebook homepage one night (because that’s what I do when I run out of I Can Has Cheezburger to look at) and seeing my (still non-existent) ex change their relationship status, and post some otherwise-adorable-but-incredibly-saccharine-to-me picture of them and their slice of victory pie. The worst part is, I’m pretty sure the WAITING for such a moment is even worse than actually living out the moment – either you are watching a live commentary of them meeting someone new, getting interested, and finally hooking up, or you run all these possibilities through your situation-exaggerator of a brain, settling on the decision that your ex will end up being together with a person who is pretty much you, but better. The only consolation I can give myself is that MAYBE, when they do finally end up with someone else, that they’re actually TRADING DOWN. Although to trade down from me you’d have to be sexually attracted to a gnat.

Ooh gnats.

So, yeah, to clear up some vagueness and actually give you a taste of my personal life, most of the people I used to like, bar two (one of whom was always in a relationship anyway and is now in another state, and the other guy totally deserves someone smarter than me so I’m not even spewing), haven’t found anyone yet. But I can extrapolate and imagine, so I would say that if I ever find someone, and then break up with them (hence finally gaining myself an ex), I would rather just not see them for ages, and then work my ass off to have some Pros to chalk up, so that when I meet them again I may have a chance to be a winner.

Unless, of course, my ex and I decide to be friends. Then I can be all Lana on their ass, and hook up with Ian Somerholder.

Ha….

In other news (this is becoming a REALLY long blog post), I was watching a few of communitychannel‘s oldest videos, and I realize that she had developed her style over the years, and she’d started off with just a webcam and her talking. I don’t know, maybe after my Project365 ends, and…maybe after a few months after it ends because I need to give the internet a break from me, I might start vlogging. If I ever do take up that idea, I’ll be sure to tell about it here. But yeah, keeping the idea alive – I don’t think I can be as funny or interesting, but I may develop a style and become the next communitychannel or kevjumba.

And THAT would be SUCH a Kill-Shot. Internet fame, woo.

Alex.

A Little Righteous And Too Proud

[Lost Without You – Delta Goodrem]

My song title choices are starting to crumble my image isn’t it? So I had quite an interesting dream last night, having finally fallen asleep after tossing and turning – I’m pretty sure my blankets should be changed to summer ones, because it’s too warm.

Speaking of which, ahoy summer!

I maintain that one day my dreams will be the root of a killer idea for a successful TV show/movie/book, but for now I’ll be the sole audience, and try to pass it on in my blogs.

I was rather amused by my dream, which was special in itself because it was actually one long run-on dream, albeit with different sections. I tried Googling dream interpretations but all I got was that the dreams I have where my teeth fall out (not even from last night) means I am insecure about my social image, or, as the Chinese would have me believe, that I’m lying and my mind is uncomfortable about that.

Well I already knew that.

So I’m going to make up my own interpretations. I’ve recently been reminded that this blog is public, so there will be a few embarrassing personal aspects of my dream I won’t include, but on the most part I can share the gist of it.

True to my sci-fi riddled mind, and with more than just a little help from watching Heroes for the past few days, the dream had me enroll in some sort of academy/training center that will nurture our special abilities and make us into these killing machines – so, Heroes meet Nikita.

The building that train takes place in is multi-leveled, and massive, and rather well furnished.

A while after training/learning started, we had a sort of royalty visit the grounds. They were very important, and knew everything going on and all the plans that the academy had for us, and it was implied that trainees had to stay out of the way and turn a deaf ear to anything we might overhear.

So, there I was, on the landing of the stairs leading the sleeping quarters to the dining area, and I overhear some conspiracy plot the Royal said to a bodyguard or follower, and I don’t remember the details – or rather, I didn’t dream the details – and I tried to keep myself quiet, but as the Royal was leaving she (it was a she, like the M character in James Bond) turned around and looked towards me, seeing me.

Anyway, that was really the smallest scene from a pretty long dream (I knew my blankets were getting too warm because everyone was stripping in my dream, but hey that could be from another meaning too…moving on). I don’t call myself close to being an expert in interpreting symbolic factors of a dream, but I might give it a shot.

Some dream symbols are really obvious: like when I dreamed I got a low 80 for my ENTER – I wonder what that could POSSIBLY be telling me about myself. Some dreams are much more cryptic: like this one.

The fact that I dreamed myself with superpowers in the first place, apart from reflecting what I’ve been watching, is also reflecting that I am feeling helpless and powerless in aspects of my life, and in my desires I am compensating for it with superhuman powers. I am trying to validate my footprint in my own life by having control over those around me, and the way I do it is through having superpowers .

I enrolled in an academy to train myself, not because I feel that even having powers I am not in control, and need to learn control, but because the academy is full of people who also have powers, so they are in positions to acknowledge my abilities without fearing me. This probably comes from my need to be acknowledged for what I can do, and to find peers who support and better me – which makes it sound like I don’t see my friends as supportive, but I think it’s more to do with my abilities in life than me.

The building is, as I said, multi-leveled and well furnished. It’s like a maze in my dreams, but I knew my way around, and everything was well lit. It could be seen that the building represents how I organize different parts of my life in my mind – personal areas like the sleeping quarters, and my public image in the dining areas. There were other areas, like a huge foyer, and, for some reason, a leisure/shopping area. So it shouldn’t be a far cry to see that the building is the foundations of my known life – things that I feel comfortable projecting about myself: the initial impression (a well lit foyer, warm and welcoming, even if I do say so myself) and the social image that I have created, which is a comprehensive shopping center with little stores for different purposes, or rather different ways of dealing with different social groups.

And then comes M, the Royal. The Royal is a character of power, of money, a character that is protected, and to be feared for the sole reason that they have power over me. The Royal suddenly comes into the building, or my life, and has access to each aspect of the building, because it’s all her property. At the same time, I (or, in this case, the “I” would be my consciousness) am kept at a distance, being ordered to worship and respect the Royal when she is in my building/life. The superpowers I gave to myself through my desires, the self-empowering, means nothing against the Royal, who holds more power simply on principle.

Then comes the fact that I catch the Royal having negative plans for the academy – ie the foundation of power I feel I have – which would have negative impact on the building – ie aspects of my life.  I am aware of this threat against the academy, but I feel safe because I’m hidden from view (I’m standing on the landing of my sleeping quarters, which would be my private life). This safety is dispersed the moment the Royal, standing in the dining area (ie my public life), turns around and sees me standing there. I am caught in the headlights, and the safety of privacy is completely destroyed – the Royal has access to my private life as well as my public life.

The question is, who is this Royal?

Anyway, there were other parts of the dream which probably alludes to different problems in life that I’m tackling, all with the running theme of a superpower academy (and I mean that in a scenery sense. I don’t think the academy has the same meaning in my other dreams as in my described dream). I won’t discuss them because this post is starting to become a bit too long, and also because they’re sort of odd and embarrassing – I already mentioned that people started to strip. So.

Alex.

Hooked…And Still Fishing

I am currently watching the new ep of How I Met Your Mother, and they’re discussing how a person can be the hooked, or the hooker (yes, the joke is still funny after Robin told it).

Basically, being played the hook is when someone who you like (who knows you like them) tells you, “I like you…but I just can’t be with you…RIGHT NOW.” This way, they can maintain whatever it is that they’re currently living, and yet still have that safety line to you, if they ever need it.

So my 2 questions are:

Have you ever been played the hook, or been the hooker (haha, it’s still funny the 3rd time round!)?

And

What are your thoughts on such actions? Is it justifiable to want to keep a safety line, or is just plain cruel?

Alex.

Interlude

I came across this “Ice cream theory” on Mai’s Tumblr just then, and I read it. I found it very very interesting.

The Ice Cream Theory.

This I suppose in a very self centered sort of way runs tangent with my Life Is A Meal theory (as Katherine had posted for me a while back).

Enjoy.

Alex.

P.S. I will write about Spanna’s birthday maybe tomorrow. And write about today…tomorrow. I’m so behind.

Monash Uni Camp 2009

On Monday and for a good half of today I was on my Monash Uni camp, at where else but Monash University?

Since it was a 2 day thing, I might cut a few things short. And we’ve had so many laughs and jokes and good one-liners that I can’t remember them all. I’ll try my best to see what comes to mind.

Got up early (but not as early as I’d have to get up tomorrow) and picked up Bianca and Fel from Bee’s house. Were one of the first ones (ish) to get there, but waited around for Carmaine and Eunice so we ended up being one of the middle-last ones to register. I was in a room with Carmaine while Bianca, Eunice, Mary, Fel and EmPow were in the next room. Actually, they’re like clusters of rooms, so as 48 and 49 Carmaine and I were in one cluster with 47, 46 and 45. And as 50 and onwards, the others were in the next cluster. We had no idea where our rooms were so it took some walking around to get there. Who the hell knew G stood for Ground level?

Started the camp off with the “Conference Housekeeping” (ah gotta love the program sheet). Were told what to do, what not to do, that it’s a school camp, etc. Were told lights out at 11. Oh what a story that became. For future references, every one of our “conference sessions” were held in a large theatre. For all but 2 sessions I sat in the front row with BRuCE, and most of the time Dani.

After the Conference Housekeeping came the Study Sensei, which wasn’t in Japanese. It was held by two girls called Sam and Laura, the former being 24 but we all thought she was about 18-19, and I still don’t know how old Laura is but she looked a bit younger. They told us various ways to study and to take notes, and what is a good thing to do, what is not, etc. They told us that exercise books are not a good idea. I thought “psh, I just bought them, no way I’m going to looseleaf now.” Laura played a memory game with us, trying to make us remember information about her family and life. I think that was the only interesting part of it all.

Had morning tea, which was basically everyone cramming into the common room grabbing at drinks and biscuits. Then we went to VCE Enrolment, where we filled out those mandatory forms and signed those legal releases. Then we were told about the sports activities for the afternoon.

Had lunch, in the dining hall, which in so many ways made us think of a Chinese restaurant – all that was missing were the soy sauce and chopsticks. Halfway through lunch, something happened that made Carmaine spill water onto her crotch. Luckily she was wearing tights so the discomfort is only known to her, no one else could see. We had a loud laugh and Bee sighed and asked no one in particular, “Do you see what I have to put up with?”

We then went to the sports activities. I signed up for Tennis but it took ages for the gate to be opened, so much so that Bianca, Shaz and EmPow left and went back to the rooms. Bianca and Shaz didn’t come back to play, but EmPow did. Fel and I rallied (that is, tried) a few times with Jenko and Gif-. Then we played singles for a while, before EmPow came back. After a while, Carmaine and Eunice joined us, and EmPow, and those two and I played a few rallies. I got rather sunburnt (again). Actually, I was wearing a wristguard (weak wrist) and I have a rather distinct tan line of where the wristguard starts and ends. I was rather puffed out and tired at the end of the game. And later that night when I had a chance to look into the mirror I was tomato red. When I got back to the room, I had a quick rinse in the shower and went out to afternoon tea. Then, back to the Deakin Theatre to listen to our principal talk, and then Miss K- talked to us about VCE stuff. Not much is what we haven’t heard, or know, but it was a bit daunting to have it all said again.

Then came a speaker called Jelena Popovic. She is a magistrate. April remarked that she talked JUST LIKE Ms MacA- and it was found out later on that the reason for that is they’re actually siblings. Popovic always made jokes about Ms MacA- being strict, and when she did she would cup her hands over the mike as if she were whispering, but by doing so she actually made her words louder and audible.

Before dinner, Carmaine went to play pool while I properly washed my hair, but when I left my room I couldn’t find her, nor anyone else. I walked around the residence area, shouting her name. I managed to find Eunice, and made our way to Shaz’s room via mobile instructions. Then, sticking my head out of Shaz’s room, I shouted “CARMAINE! CARMAINE!” I found a few people walking around down below (that is, Shaz’s room is on the 2nd floor, or 3rd floor if you’re American) and asked “HAVE YOU SEEN CARMAINE!?” Someone answered, “No I didn’t. But…” then went out of sight and earshot, and I started frantically shouting “BUT WHAT?!” I went back to our room in case she was there, nup. Walked around the area a little bit more just in case, and asked a lot more people. Nup. Finally, Carmaine called Eunice back in Shaz’s room, and I went to get her. Upon seeing her, I said, “Don’t be surprised if later people start telling you that I’m looking for you.” Later, at dinner, Nagi-, one of the people whom I shouted at, asked me, “So did you end up finding Carmaine?” Played pool with Carmaine after dinner, and somehow pulled a hammy on the table.

Had another speaker after that, talking about relationships. Her talk had ups and downs, I suppose it was a good relief from the incessant talk about schoolwork, but at the same time it wasn’t anything I didn’t already know about myself. The speaker was clearly a big fan of Sex In The City and Delta Goodrem. She showed us a a couple of love songs that might make different people feel different ways, two of which were Goodrem songs and one was “Feel” by Robbie Williams. We talked about Toxic and Nontoxic relationships, and reasons why people might stay in the latter. Nearly every suggestion that came up somehow rounded its way back to “for the sex” or “for the money”. Then, near the back I hear a voice say, “Emotional blackmail. As in if the partner says ‘I’ll kill myself if you leave me’.” Took a look-see, and of course, that was Dani (love you). There was a clip called “catfight” which was actually about 7 tiny adorable puppies chasing and bullying this cat, which was trying to run away and defend itself. Also there was a music clip for “I’m A Believer” the song, and true to our nature, we all sang along to the chorus. Oh, and almost forgot to mention. There was a poem which the speaker wanted us to listen to and write down 3 emotions we think the poem, a breakup poem, was about. I don’t remember much of the poem except it was a generic sappy heartbreak crap, but there were 2 lines that went something along the lines of “You blew it one too many times…I don’t want to get off the joyride that you give me” or something. About 3/4 of the theatre sniggered, I included. Carmaine elbowed me exasperatedly, because at time we were sitting very close to the teachers.

Had supper, then had some time left before Lights Out at 11. We all (that is, BRuCE, Shaz and Fel) went up to Shaz’s room and hung out a bit, and decided to play truth-or-truth. We got as far as something about Bee that I can’t remember but it was something I knew, Eunice’s past crushes, the fact that I’d rather do Michael Jackson than Mr G (Only because like HELL I’d EVER do Mr G), and that Carmaine would rather do Mrs Wil- than Ms Gar-, but only because she likes the former’s lipstick (ie, the “taste of her cherry chapstick”. One of my better calls for the night). EmPow, Franco and Hobo came in later, and we started playing Mafia. In the 4 rounds, I was a Mafia, Detective, Detective, then the narrator. Won as the Mafia, lost as Detective first time because we blamed the wrong people (haha Carmaine was my fellow detective but we ended up blaming the wrong person, who was a Civillian), lost as Detective second time because I was killed, and then as the narrator narrated a rather funny story (everyone laughed…but I was gruesome…so…) and in the end Fel managed to give away the game.

We were hitting about 15 minutes until lights out when we all went back to our rooms. Had a bit of a confused moment when Carmaine and I wanted to spend the night in Bee and Eunice’s cluster, but couldn’t lug the mattresses to their cluster without being suss, and then later on when Carmaine and I were trying to get Bee and Eunice over to my room because if we moved Carmaine’s mattress to my room we’d have space, it was already past 11 and Bee was too scared. So instead we slept in my room, I on the floor because I didn’t like how soft the bed was (nor did I like how soft the mattress and pillow were) and talked for about 2 and a half hours. At some point, we were lying horizontally across the bed, with our feet on the wall next to the bed, and we started stomping the wall. Then came a loud “thump thump” and we were like “OH CRAP SOMEONE’S IN THE ROOM NEXT TO US!” Turned out to be Mary, and we were concerned that she may have overheard our conversation, but she said “I WAS ASLEEP UNTIL YOU TWO STARTED STAMPING ON THE WALL!” We called Eunice and they were playing Snap and Spit in their room, so we just kept on talking. Covered many an interesting topic of conversation, and were pretty honest with each other which I was really really grateful for. Then at around 1:20 am, we called Dani’s mobile, and were greeted with a small unappreciating croak. We asked, “Aww, were you asleep?” And got a confirming croak in reply. “Oh, sorry honey. Go back to sleep. Goodnight, we love you.” “Errgghh…” “Aww you’re so cute!” “Urrhh…”

We pretty much decided to go to sleep after that, but I couldn’t fall asleep because of the foreign bed. Got up at around 3 to pee, and every muscle in my body ached (so damned out of shape) from tennis. Had a tough time trying to open the damn door, and Carmaine half-asleep asked “What are you doing?” “Go back to sleep, I’m trying to open this son of a bitch door.”

Phone alarm went off at 6:30 but continued sleeping until 7. Eunice came into the room with her Wong-Ar shirt, and then Bee joined us. In a general sleepy mess we changed, brushed, washed, toileted (and Carmaine used the hand dryer to blow dry her hair, what a champ) and packed. Had breakfast, and April and Dani sat with us. Bianca wasn’t too happy that I was talking so loudly in the morning (no one was…but Carmaine smiled and joked around with me anyway). Dani tried to kill me by feeding me a super large piece of fruit. After breakfast we went to the pool room and shot some balls (ha). We heard through the grapevine that on the previous night, on one of the upper floors, a few girls were in the room together when a teacher came around and so they either went back to their rooms, or, as a few did, hid in the cupboard. Except the teacher heard them hiding into the cupboard so they were ultimately busted hiding in the cupboard. Oh man, that’s pretty classic, in my opinion.

Listened to some Peer Support talks and tips, and some things about the Common Room which is OURS NOW. In the Peer Support thing, we had an activity in groups and were each given a scenario to cope with. My group had “You left your school notes on the train and is having a SAC in a few days” and was asked “What will you do to minize this happening in the future?” I wrote “Staple it to your forehead.”

We then went off into a few different things, where we could talk to ex-MacRob students about some of the specific courses we might be intersted in. Design was a funny one, because the girl more or less told us not to do it because it’s shit pay, loads of work, and no social life. Arts was vague but I actually think it’s pretty cool because there are so many choices in Arts. But Media. Oh Media. I am actually now excited about doing Media and Communication in Melb U. First of all, the contact hours are only about 12 hours a week (score) and secondly, even if I ultimately can’t get what I want to do, I think that marketing and PR isn’t bad, and I believe that I have the creativity skills to get me there. As long as I pull my arse in and really get out there and do work experience. Plus if I go to Melb U, I may be able to live with Dani. Carmaine is interestined in Pharmacy, and I think that would be so incredibly awesome if she does it because my parents would love her more. Haha! But there are other reasons too, and as she said her wanting Pharmacy would motivate her to do well in Chem this year. Eunice is interested in Med (what else? But I honestly think Eunice is one of the few people who would REALLY REALLY just SUPERACHIEVE in that field). I didn’t see much of Bianca after this conference but then again I already have a fair idea of what she’s passionate about.

Had lunch on the floor of the dining room due to lack of seats. Mai took pictures of us being hobos. Found out something awesome about April’s brother, and I am so happy for him because I know he must be so happy right now, and so carefree. And also there was a funny mo’, when as a joke I said, “Carmaine might be hiding something from us all this time” and April replied, “with those tights on, I don’t think so.”

Finally, did some evaluation of the overall camp, and then left Monash and went home. Walked home in the sun, therefore I got sunburnt AGAIN. School photos is tomorrow. Oh dear god help me. I checked out my face; on the side with the fringe, it’s fine-ish. On the side without the fringe…oh my FUNKY gosh. I look like a premature version of Two-Face.

Anyway, I’ve written a pretty damn long blog. I’m sorry to make you read all this.

Keep Cool (and your dreams alive)

D.F.

Like a marathon

I’m a pretty huge fan of talking and writing in metaphors and analogies and whatnot. I don’t know if you’ve noticed it. A lot of the times when friends come to me for help, I’ve tried to put their situation into an analogy so they can sort of see how to get out of it. I guess in a way I’m like a nicer and…slightly less intimidating version of S- Sensei.

What had happened was, and I hope it’s okay for me to share this story, Sensei would give us analogies of what was happening with our schoolwork. So once when I wrote an essay too long, and wrote a criteria out of range, he told me that by doing that I’ve basically received 2 black eyes. A double knockout. Because not only did I get marks taken off for going over the limit, I’ve also not filled in the criteria because they don’t mark what is out of range. Anyway, there was the one memorable one. A student was struggling a little in class, and went to Sensei to ask whether she should continue Japanese for Yr 12. His response (my closest recollection to her paraphrasing of what he said) was this:

“Imagine that we are all playing a game of basketball, but you are really fat. So even if you run around a lot, and you shout ‘pass me the ball!’ and you do this and you do that, you’re still fat, and you’re going to be very tired after the first quarter. Everyone else is skinny and healthy, so they can keep running but you’re fat so you’re going to die by halftime. This is you in Japanese. You are the fat basketball player.”

So, basically, I think he wasn’t so hot on her continuing Japanese. I thought he could’ve said, “Look I know you’re trying your best but the workload in Yr 12 is even harder so many this isn’t the best choice for you.” or something along those nice lines that teachers are made to say. Kudos to him though, for voicing it in a humorous way.

I think there was a time when a friend of mine was having relationship problems – or rather, problems with getting over it – and I said something like, “Ultimately, this is a bridge that you have to build alone, to get over. I mean, we your friends have given you the materials and the support and all that, but you’re gonna have to build the thing. It’s tempting to just stay on the side you are now, but I think to move on, you’d have to build that bridge.” I think she’s really on her way to doing it.

Okay, but the metaphor/analogy (I’d say metaphor) that made me smile today was this:

(I had to edit out bits that would make it personal)

“Think of your relationship as a marathon. You start off a little jerkily then you settle into a rhythm once you get into it. Sooner or later though you’ll hit a curve or an obstacle and you have to deal with it, If you don’t your [sic] stuck there not going anywhere. But once you get past it you’ve gained that much more and it means something, even if it’s small. Then you keep going. “

And the more I thought about that the more right she was (whoever the hell you are, you crazy thing). At the start of a friendship, you’re so energized, you feel you can sprint the whole way. Then you slow down, maybe tire out. It’s once you settle into that rhythm, and time gets its claws into you, that you can really test out your endurance. So many runners fall out, they give up. But if you last the distance, that feeling that you get when you cross the finish line, it’s like you’re “on top of the world” as I was told recently. And yeah, on the way you’ll meet potholes, snakes, hobos, whatever, but they’re mere distractions. They’re not world-ending.

I’m interested in making a VCE metaphor that includes piranhas and Tasmania Jones (OH NO I DIDN’T!)

Keep Cool (and runnin’)

D.F.

P.S. Yeah I actually just thought about signing off with “Keep Cool” and then something to do with the blog I just wrote. Let’s see how long I can last doing that.