Because The Drugs Never Work

[Teenagers – My Chemical Romance]

Today was the final assembly for my school life, ever. Okay, so one more category tagged for School haha.

There isn’t much to say, except congratulations to everyone, we did fantastic (the official result comes out tomorrow but I think we’ve managed to pull in first again. Then again, Garvey wasn’t sounding very confident).

Also it was funking hot.

It was so hot, in fact, that when Jen, Sonia and I got on a tram, a girl (who I think was a MacRob chick but I can’t be sure) remarked,” It’s so hot in here!” To my usual self, I said half loud enough to hear, “That would be because of me.” The girl looked at me and then said, “Yeah probably.”

Easily made my day.

Now I’m home, and basically waiting for tomorrow, because it will be cooler, and Katherine’s coming over!

Score.

There are some other personal stuff going on at the mo, for me, but I think I’ll not bore and depress you as the festive season nighs, and I’ll just let you know that while I’m pretty sad, I think it’ll be okay.

Alex.

MLIA, I’m Hanging Onto You!

So today was another “study session” with Jen at State library. I’ve given up on saying it’s a real study session. Who’re we kidding?

Met up at 9:30 UCMC (by the way, that term never has and never will catch on, will it) and went upstairs to Gloria Jeans, where we both got one of those Iced Tim Tam drink things. Discussed losing weight and fatness for a while, and then we went to State at around 10, past 10 ish.

Went in (it was very cool. Way to pay attention to global warming, guys) and started trying to study for Legal Studies. Two minutes in, we fell into a coma. So we played some games on our iPods (speaking of which mine still isn’t fixed, I still can’t link it to my computer. Can anyone help?) and repeatedly said “Okay we HAVE to study we HAVE to study” and then we didn’t.

At around 12 Jen felt hungry so we went out to a Vietnamese place on Swanston Street. I had Pho (Not Pris. She comes later) and Jen had some broken rice thing. It was hot so I decided to treat myself to a VB. When I ordered it, the guy looked at me and said, “are you old enough to drink?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” And then went away with our order. That was some epic ID checking right there. If only nightclubs did the same, right?

“Are you old enough to grind in an over-age venue?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.”

“Are you old enough to drive?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.”

I decided to be cool and ate some of the chilli that came with the Pho, and bit down on the seeds. It was…interesting.

Went back to State afterwards, and it was really really really hot. Went to the Games Room and played Wii for a while, where Jen owned me in Wii Tennis and Bowling (shh). Then Pris called me, and her and Carmaine came along, with Dom following (well Dom…would have been there regardless…did you know he dreamt about State Library? Duuuuude). Carmaine, Jen and I played Little Big Planet (Jen and I took one control, where Jen was direction and I was jumping etc) and Pris and Dom played Wii. Then they got bored and joined us at Little Big Planet.

I helped figure out how to hold onto things, and spent quite a lot of the time hanging onto Carmaine’s character while she dragged me around. Then we came across a trap where it’s a ghost thing that floats up and down, and if the ghost thing covers your character you die. She got annoyed at me hanging onto her (well hell it was fun.) and aimed it so that the ghost covered our character but not hers. We died, she didn’t. She laughed evilly.

And then I’ll skip how good Dom is at the game.

And then they left to study, and Jen and I actually studied. We went through a practice exam orally (dude, don’t) except I think it was an easy exam because we did it really easily. Studied a bit more, and then played on iPod again.

Jen needed to charge her iPod, so I went to get my recharge cord out of the locker. Except 4 hours was up by then, so I had to pay an extra dollar for another four hours, but only needed 1 hour. Then, this happened (and I submitted it to MLIA, so hopefully you’ll see it):

Today, I was annoyed at having to pay a dollar for another four hours on a locker when I only need it for an hour more. I put in my two dollar coin, and heard my change fall into the slot. Reaching in, I came back with 2 one-dollar coins; the previous user had forgotten to take their change, thus giving me a free hour on my locker. I felt like State Library was apologizing for making me pay. MLIA.

It was awesome.

Left at around 4 and went to JB. They didn’t have the headphones I wanted. Said bye to Jen and went to Big W. They didn’t have the headphones I wanted. Went back to Melbourne Central and bought a Monster energy drink with the 2 dollars I then had because of above, drank it on the train home (shouldn’t have done it) and then at Holmesglen these bunch of fobby TAFE students came in loudly talking in Chinese about how they fail in English (agreed).

Tomorrow, I have my Legal exam. And then after that only Chinese which I frankly don’t even worry about anymore. Maybe I’ll write 1 or 2 more practice essays and I’m done. I’m so glad the exam period was as scary as I feared – but it was still pretty shitty.

Alex.

 

Count

Number of exams done so far:

2

Number of exams to go:

5

Number of minutes I had to write my language analysis:

40

Number of times I made the joke “I did that anal so hard the table shook”

20 (or more…probably more)

Number of people I plan to praise me today:

10

Number of people I’ve already asked

3

I’ll keep the count going for the next 3 weeks.

Alex.

P.S.

Number of snails I nearly stepped on today while walking home:

8

Who’s the eco-friendly bitch? Me. Why were they in the middle of the path anyway?! STAY ON THE GRASS!

Also

Number of times the thought crossed my mind that if I tag this heavily with VCE English etc, I’ll get the George Clooney rush again:

4

Somebody To Lean On

Ah, thus my 3rd installment of one of the most awesomest weeks of my life.

Now, as you may remember I went to sleep at 1 am on the Wednesday night (Thursday morning, whatever) and I had a 5 am wake up on Thursday morning in order to catch a 6:25 train so we could be at school by 7:30. Saw Eunice at Glen Waverley which I didn’t expect because she’d previously said she wouldn’t. But meh.

She was in brown overalls and later bandaged up her head, because as Jack from Jack and Jill, she fell down and broke her crown.

More MacRob people arrived, and then some MHS guys in UNIFORM as well. Annie came on at Mount Waverley with a huge spoon. I thought it was a dirty metaphor until she said that Jen T is a fork, and they’re the famous (if not stuffed up) “dish and spoon” (you can see the stuff up because Jen T was a fork).

I was in this huge cape as Phantom Of The Opera (Yeah, I gave up on Mojo Jojo or the whole Powerpuff Girls thing, for that matter). The mask stuck out weirdly so I didn’t wear it. People thought I was Dracula. I was okay with that.

Eunice, Fel and I got off at Melb Central to go to Coles, and I thought it would be a good idea to buy a small box of tissues. Met up with Carmaine who was the train after us, and we took the tram up to school, getting off at Bowen (I’m just using these terms because I won’t really use themΒ  much after this….sad) and going over the overpass. There were no bras on there, much to Eunice’s disappointment (there was a prank or something planned where we all tied a bra to the overpass…I don’t know). We went around to the Lakeside Courtyard where we were celebrating, and there were teachers standing around making sure we didn’t have fun.

Had some pancakes and fairy floss for breakfast, and then went on to start camwhoring. THERE WAS A JUMPING CASTLE! Went onto it 2 times, once with Sonam who landed butt first on my face, and the 2nd time with Julia and co., with the former deciding to test the side safety nets by pushing me repeatedly onto it.

Took photos for the first 20 minutes until woe woe woe my batteries ran out. I relied on other people for photos. And, of course, I became the camera mule, taking pictures for other people.

There were many amazing costumed groups, some of the memorable ones were:

The Powerpuff Girls (of course) and the Rowdy Rough Boys

The Soft Drinks Cans (they made these huge cans that they wore, and Huey especially wobbled in them)

The 2 Rubiks Cubes (I tried solving them. The girls inside asked what I was doing. I said solving them. They laughed.)

Bridezillas (it was freaking scary)

Snow White and the 7 Dwarves (Nug was a dwarf. I got to laugh) and of course the entourage of Evil Witches and whatnots

Bumblebee arm on Optimus Prime from Transformers (here’s looking at Bel)

Madeline and the French Nun Woman Whose Name I Forgot! Someone remind me.

Firemen.

The French Revolution people (I have no idea who they were meant to be, but they had good facial hair)

And of course, the Oompa Loompas and Willy Wonka, which scared the crap out of me. I meant the orange people though.

There were many others unnamed, and all of them were good and you could tell everyone put a lot of effort into it.

After much excitement and photos, it was time to go to the hall for the assembly. We yelled, we cheered, and of course we…but back up…background first.

For the previous week, it has been known that the clocks have been disappearing from every single classroom in school. While most of the year level knew that was happening, we didn’t actually know WHY. This wasn’t revealed until at assembly, Saf stood up there onstage and said, “Okay girls, on the count of 3 sing with me.” No one knew what song, and Saf said, “Just go with it ladies.”

“1…2…3…”

“I want one moment in…time!” And at that exact moment every clock that we had (which was every clock the school had) were raised to face the rest of the school behind us, and we all joined in a heartfelt, off-key, screeched out and by all means AWESOME rendition of One Moment In Time (the high-high-highlight being “when I’m racing with destiny” when everyone forgot EB’s advice to let the note envelope us and instead tried to shoot it from the top of our heads…it was nasty).

Then, the first act came on, and it was a lovely little dance number. I can’t recall all of the songs, but I just remember 2 scenes. 1, the first scene, when Mishie and Rach Tan (the former being a MacRob girl the latter being an “ENTER score” sought each other out through the crowd to Swift’s Love Story (“we were both young when I first saw you”). And then the 2nd scene was when Mishie was left by herself when ENTER abandoned her, and she sobbed out “ALL BY MYSELF!”

Then it was time for the video! Except there was a technical difficulty, so Amee went ahead with her piano improvisation. It brought tears for many of the girls, and started the mood for the video off.

The video was great, even if I do say so myself (and on behalf of my fellow committee-ers). It brought laughter where it was wanted, gasps where it was planned, and tears where it should be. Mr Rus- as Superman was amazing (and it was the first time I saw that skit, so I laughed so hard I teared), and all the other videos were of top-notch standard. People said afterwards that not a single video in it was boring, every one of them was great. That was the best compliment we could have gotten.

After the video, the tissues I bought came in handy, as those around me started bawling (I got the aloe vera kind, so it was good on their noses).

Then Pru- and Mari- went onstage and sang “Lean On Me”, during which Pru- cracked up which cause most of everyone else to cry (I still didn’t cry…which was weird).

Later on, when the rest of the school had left (we all did a standing ovation for the Yr 11s and others who were with us. I NEARLY felt like tearing at the thought of leaving Catherine, Fa and Julia L)Β  we started on the awards of “Most Likely”. And, true enough, Bel and Julia got “Most likely to be each others bridesmaids”. Mari- got “Friend Whore” because she was the most frequently mentioned person in the 3 categories “Most Compatible Pair” “Most Unlikely Pair” and something else.

After everything, after farewells to everyone, we headed out to leave. The Yr 9s gave us a human tunnel for us to leave by, each of them saying “we’ll miss you! Good luck!” and we all agreed, perhaps this bunch has some hope left yet.

Had a final Form get together at the picnic tables, where Jen and Nay handed out these little envelopes and in it they’ve described each person as an element. I was Sodium. It was a salty (not sweet) description, and it was lovely.

Left with BRuCE, Fel, Dani and Zara to Dani’s place for an impromptu BBQ. I felt sleepy by that point. Called Julia L to wish her a happy birthday and turned out she cried!! What a darl.

And thus ended my career as a high school student. In less than 1 month I will be free. Free from exams. Yet at the same time free of the protective and familiar environment that I’ve grown accustomed to over the last 4 years, and free of the faces that I’ve come taken for granted to see. And I don’t feel like it’s a good thing at all.

Alex.

Suit up and grab me some boobage

On Wednesday it was dress signing day. And after that was the valedictory.

I couldn’t find my school dress so I nicked a huge bunch of papers from the library printer and got everyone to sign on them, the papers, instead. Thus I didn’t have any Sharpie marks on my skin during Valedictory (here’s looking at you, Julia), and people wrote nicer messages. I still haven’t had the time to sit down and read them yet. (AND CARMAINE! You never got to write a message.)

I signed Spanna’s right boob as a joke from the previous day. In the previous day I took a picture of Spanna’s generous cleavage and told her I’d tag one boob as me and one boob as Julia. Which is why I signed the boob that is me on Wednesday.

When I got to school, I noticed that Dani’s left boob got taken by Andrew already (‘cos that’s where her heart is. Wtflux? Don’t ask.) so I got her right boob with “this is mine mine mine mine mine – Alex”.

That started my mission to get as many right boobs as I can with “this is mine mine mine mine (the number of ‘mine’ depended on the size of said breast) – Alex” as possible. I actually managed about maybe over 100? Hehe.

When the boob was taken, I took the crotch.

When both was taken, as in the case of Anto-, I took the bum. That one was actually surprisingly embarrassing.

During recess, someone boarded up all the windows in the common room and we had a rave party. Loud music, people jumping. It was fantastic.

After Legal (during which we did no work but sat around and were happy and took pictures and hugged Nik-) and our last class ever, Dani, Zara and I went to Dani’s place to get ready for Valedictory. I played with the new kittens (these are much smaller than the ones from last year) and they gave me confused looks. (By the way, I tried uploading photos but it wasn’t working.)

Got all my clothes ready, and Andrew came home, changed, and we were off to the Crown Palladium.

When we had finger food (well, it was MacRob, people were fighting for food) we camwhored and everyone remarked how tall the heels were and so forth. Met Spanna’s mom, and a man who I thought was her dad but turned out to be Chez’s dad. That was bloody embarrassing and not my fault.

Sat down for speeches. Trying to fast forward this because I haven’t had breakfast yet…

Had some great speeches from everyone, and it was quite funny when one half of the room’s lights began to turn on and off. Frank and Caro- performed their song and it was quite heartbreaking and caused quite a few tears when Frank started crying halfway through.

Then came the time for everyone to go up and get their stuff. When I went up I called out Clarkey’s name and gave him a high five. It was awesome (despite my mom telling me that I’m an idiot for it later on. I’m not going into that, by the way…)

After Valedictory BRuCE, Fel and our respective parents and the odd sibling or two went to dinner at The Pub at Crown (I finally went to the place SonJ had so much trouble explaining before, she said “the place with tables and chairs and music and people”). I ordered a steak and chips, and it was tough but very delicious.

Went home. That was a disaster. For the 2nd time in a row we had to catch a replacement bus because they were obviously doing something to the tracks at night. Mom felt too sick to stay on the bus and demanded to get out at MT WAVERLEY where we stood around at 11:40 at night in the cold. Couldn’t get a taxi, so had to call a family friend to come up. Parents argued for so long as to who to call that by the time the family friend came up to Mount Waverley from Wheelers Hill, the next replacement bus had come and gone and it was past midnight.

Got driven back to the Glen where our car was parked, and mom proceeded not to drive and just sit there for the next 2o minutes. Finally got home, and had to do all the other things like shower and clear memory space on my camera, so that when I went to sleep it was 1 am, and I was waiting for a 5 am wake up to get to school for early breakfast.

Now you understand why I was tired.

Otherwise, though, the night was incredibly fun, as was the day.

The next installment, which is our “muck up” day, will be written about tonight.

Alex.

Big girls and bigger girls – all are beautiful

I suppose you wondered why I quoted FERGIE in my previous previous post “Big girls don’t cry…” etc.

That was because I wrote that on Tuesday, which was the day of the Middle School Soiree.

Jen and I, being in the guitar ensemble, stayed behind afterschool for the soiree.

The dress-up theme for that day was Previous School Uniform and Carmaine came in just casual, but it looked a bit preppy (save for her short shorts). Someone asked her if that was her old school uniform. I said, “Yes, because her old school was Ralph Lauren.”

Afterschool, after sound check (I had my first sound check, and last, and it was awesome), Jen and I went into South Melbourne just basically to unwind and eat/relax before the soiree. It was a hot day, 27 degrees celcius, so we went to the Coffee Club on Clarendon. It had free Wi-fi which made our afternoons. We had our iced drinks and instead of JUST TALKING TO EACH OTHER across the table, we Facebook messaged each other.

It was fun.

Went to Baker’s Delight and I bought a chilli pizza which was actually chilli, kudos to them.

At 5:20 pm the weather suddenly changed to become colder. I took the time.

Walked around South Melbourne for a bit so Jen could have a gawk at a few things, and went past the Bookstore on Coventry St. We went in and went to the back which was the kids’ section. Spent about 40 minutes there just browsing through kids’ books.

Saw a book titled 1001 Books Kids Must Read Before They Grow Up. In the ages 12+ section there was Twilight. I reckoned the book could’ve just been 1000 Books.

Also saw these two books (one of which not only do I know already I’ve actually posted a blog about it over a year ago, to whomever can remember it):

Does anyone remember this post?

And also this:

It made me rofl hard.

Then, as Jen went to the counter to buy “Where The Wild Things Are” the guy behind the counter asked, “is this for a little girl or a little boy? Or a big girl or a big boy?” And I started laughing because it was for SonJ, who is a big tall girl.

When I then went up to buy the first book for Carmaine, the guy asked, “Is this for the same big girl?”

Jen replied, “No this is a different big girl…a biggER girl.”

We laughed all the way to Nandos.

I bought a coleslaw because I wasn’t hungry, Jen bought regular chips. We went to the playground area near the roundabout near Napier St and ate it, and then went back to school to perform.

We were okay.

That’s the end of Tuesday.

It was awesome fun.

Alex.