A Girl Like You Is Impossible To Find

[Fall For You – Secondhand Serenade]

This is Day 3 of Sorrento.

Alright, so my feet were in pretty bad shape, so Spanna, Tiff and I decided not to go out anywhere. We had pancakes and fruit salad for breakfast. Spanna cut the melons, and left a very thick layer of crunchy skin on it, so everyone sounded like they were breaking their jaw. After breakfast, we fired up the Korean version of Hana Yori Dango, and we literally sat there for the entire day eating and watching Korean guys, making remarks like “OMG SHE’S SUCH A BITCH!” whenever the lead girl was a bitch towards the curly haired guy (who, by the way, Vania called dibs on), or screaming, “HE’S SO CUTE!” whenever Ji Hoo (or Hanazawa Rui, in the Jap version) smiled. That, actually, was only done by Tiff.

We ate shit loads. We had a huge box of junk food on top of all the other supplies, like bread and meat etc, so Julia and Bel urged us to pig out, as we couldn’t and wouldn’t take all that stuff back. So, for the whole day, we watched HYD and ate and ate and ate. Jen was unfortunately given a pack of chips, from which she ate and ate and ate. She couldn’t stop!

Then, at around lunchtime, we hear a car horn outside. I  look through the blinds and who do I see but SonJ! She got driven up by her mate Dan, and it was a surprise! Forgetting the immense pain on my feet, I ran out to give her a hug. She came in, and then after a while went to the beach with Bel and Julia to join April, Jen and Lily who were there already (alright so not all 12 of us are reclusive losers). We kept watching HYD.

Then later on nearing dinner time, Bel, SonJ and Jen wanted to watch Sweeney Todd. So we put that on, and seeing as I’ve seen it already, I went to the kitchen where Shar- and Suse were just sitting around. They had a candle lit, and Suse was using a charred skewer to write stuff on the paper towel. I had an idea to write “LET ME OUT” in creepy handwriting with the charred skewer, so I was letting the skewer burn in the candle, then using the embers to write the words. Unfortunately I got as far as “LET ME OU” before I forgot to blow out the small flame on the skewer, and so when it was held to the paper towel the entire thing caught on fire! Shar- had some lemon-lime bitters and I swear she was going to through the slightly alcoholic drink onto the fire, so I quickly grabbed the towel, ran to the sink and slammed the tap on.

For the next ten minutes we continued burning small bits of paper towel in the sink. Come on! It was bloody fun. It also smelled quite bad. And we left a small char mark in the sink which we maintain is “sauce stain”.

Then Bel started preparing dinner, making pizzas! I went into the lounge room to watch Get Smart (because I haven’t seen it 3 times already). Then around the end of it I went into the kitchen were a small drinking party had started. Watched Tiff try to do a tequila shot. She actually spat some of it back out, but that was because she dumb enough to hold it on her mouth and not swallow.

Ah I just got distracted by Spanna’s upload of photos.

Anyway that night we played “I Never”, but with actual alcohol this time. Sure I targeted April. She held her booze fine. I got a bit tipsy (found it hard to walk like a normal person). We started watching The Grudge but that sucked, so instead we changed to watch One Missed Call Final but without English subtitles. We made up dialogue, which probably had nothing to do or everything to do with the movie. Went to sleep at around 1 in April’s bunk. Halfway through the night, she flipped over, squished my cheeks, patted my face, then I realized she was still asleep. I don’t know what she was doing. She snored. It was funny.

I suppose I’ll write Day 4 in here as well seeing as it was mostly just packing. Jen got bitten by a mozzie on one eyelid. Like. One eyelid. It was hugely swollen. She got bitten everywhere else too. Packed, went to the bus stop, and took the bus trip back. It wasn’t as long, and I went on MSN and etc on my phone, so it passed the time. Trained back to Richmond from Frankston, and then went home. The moment I sat down in front of the computer, I swear any motor mechanism in my body just stopped.

Well, that was Sorrento! Partied, rested, burned, walked, laughed, sang, screamed, and ate. God did we eat.

Alex.

She Will Always Be My Sunkissed Trampoline

[Little Joanna – McFly]

This is Day 2 of Sorrento.

Damn it, I left it too long, things are getting hazy. That and I’m trying to finish off the rest of the tequila (about 1/3 of the bottle) that no one else wanted to take home.

Before I continue, though, I just want to say that the lyrics are always random. Dani said that the brain automatically tries to make some connection to some hidden meaning.

I started the 2nd day with Jen’s and Annie’s voices waking me up. It was ironic because it was Annie’s voice (and Tiff’s, screaming stuff like “STOP TOUCHING ME THERE!” – they shared a bed) that kept me up the previous night. I turned on the TV and watched Sesame Street. The letter of the day is J, and the number was 16.

Anyway, everyone got up at some point, stumbled around and had breakfast (Jen made the most orgasmic scrambled eggs) and then got ready for the beach.

Went to the beach, which was about 5 minutes away, and on the way passed some road workers, one of whom offered to “be your lifeguard, if ya want?”. No.

Slapped on sunscreen (apparently not enough in some places, as we found out later). Then decided to fill up my water gun. I actually went completely into the water in my tank top and running shorts, which was dumb because the shorts were designed to hold water, so after I stood up, I looked like I was pissing myself for about 5 minutes. We decided to “dig a hole, and put a nerd in it”. So April went in. Then we did the obligatory body shape thing, except we decided to go for a Lady GaGa theme.

Er, yes, the gun is in fact her “gun”.

And you can’t see as clearly, but the assets on her chest were Spanna sized. In April’s own words, she “can’t even see past them”.

The weather was awesome. We were worried that at best we can get half a day of windy cold beach, but instead we got this (and sorry for the chapped lips, but salt water is yucky. Yes I had some in my mouth. April thought it would HILARIOUS):

That, by the way, is Spanna. You can’t see her boobies but trust you me, they’re…what’s a synonym for big? Gigantic? Yeah okay.

Anyway, frolicked around in the sand for a bit. We ate packed sandwiches, and Bel’s sandwich got attacked by some hungry seagulls, who continued to try to nom the half sandwich the whole way through lunch.

Speaking of annoying things hanging around; the workers that were all pervy before came back and blatantly sat at the top of the beach, about 10 meters away from us, and watched us. They actually ate lunch watching us. Well, at least we all believed it was us (Shar- got really creeped out) it could be the ocean view but we highly doubted it.

Sunbaked heaps. Well, they sunbaked. I simply let myself crisp. I think I’ll probably die for posting this picture but hell.

To whomever this picture depicts: If you simply don’t tell me off for putting it there no stranger will know who you are. To the people who do recognise the girl: I KNOW RIGHT?! KERCHOW!

Went back at around 2 or 3, and then Jen, Spanna and I wrote up the stuff for Carmaine (just quick birthday notes, filled with love) and I took a quick shower. The gritty nature of my hair was great, I felt like a true surfie. Actually I just felt salty and burnt. This was the burn on my back:

It’s actually quite embarrassing to show it. It looks so dumb.

Alright, so then Jen and I, get this, walked into Blairgowrie again. Remember that map from yesterday? I did it AGAIN! Turned out I had pretty awful sunburn on the backs of my feet so the walking didn’t help. Nearly fainted once. It was awful. In the end we missed the cutoff time for posting it (who knew at Sorrento/Blairgowrie it would be 3pm?) so Carmaine, you probably received it by now, a day late. Sorry!

Went back, and then had dinner. It was the best dinner ever! We had some of the best dinner table conversations ever, starting from Tiff saying to everyone, “Oh my gosh, Spanna is such a freak in bed” (she meant Annie was just being weird, not the other meaning. But we all took it the other way anyway, and I was choking with laughter for about 3 whole minutes) to my saying “they should invent fly nets with holes for the face and arms so you could stick your face and arms through the whole while you eat” and April countering with, “why can’t you just get nets that go all around the table?”

That night we played punishment. Basically two names are drawn, and then a punishment drawn. Whatever the punishment is (we kept it tame and civil) the two have to do to each other. For example, April had to do a CS Cowboy shot (do not ask what CS is)

Once I got drawn out with the punishment “cut a bit off the fringe”. Everyone else was saying, “Oh that’s easy.” But I actually was terrified. NOT MY FRINGE! I passed it over to Shar-. She didn’t give a crap.

Then we watched Scream. That movie was done by Scary Movie, and we all agreed that the movie was MADE to be parodied. Because the movie itself felt like a parody. It was horrendously hilarious, but for the fun of it we all did the screaming like “GET OUT OF THE ROOM!” “HE’S BEHIND YOU!” “JUMP OFF THE ROOF!” “DON’T RUN UPSTAIRS!” “RUN, BITCH! RUN!” I think scary movies are just much more fun when you’re with friends who get scared easily (April, I’m looking at you) and scream so you scream to make them scream.

Then after that we watched a bit of Team America but everyone went to sleep anyway. Pretty much I only wanted Sonam to see the puppet sex scene, which she did. She said at the end of it, “there were things that I didn’t know…you could do.” Well, we learn something new everyday.

Tiff, Spanna and I were the last ones to bed. That’s because the 3 of us were the most/only ones burnt, and we were in pain. Tiff had the massive-est burn on her back. It was actually painful to look at it. I wanted to hug her but hugs also pain her. Breathing probably pained her. We used up a very long spanking session worth of moisturizer on her back. (Speaking of moisturizers, it turned out we had medicated sun burn lotion at home. Dad didn’t think we’d need it at the beach, apparently.)

I slept at around 4:30, after checking my emails and FML on my phone. Then I woke up at 8:30 from Jen’s voice. That’s a story for the next post, though.

Alex.

Don-don-don-don’t hold back

Today was Vania’s 18th birthday, and we had her birthday party at April’s place.

Got there before anyone else did, win. Vania came later on, and got stuff set up. Brought a respektable amount of alcohol so that April can make sex on the beach.

I still snigger when I say that.

Got Singstar set up, and started warming up with a few songs. Bo came, then Bel and Julia, then Li-. We really got into the swing of things and then we played Pass The Mic and that was stupid hard.

April and I did battle on Grace Kelly by Mika. We actually did pretty well. It’s a good song.

Aristarchus, April’s cat, rubbed himself on everyone and everything that came along.

Mimay and Fah- came along much later, and then Lily left. We had ice cream cake, and then just before Vania cut the cake, we (or me) suggested that Vania do a shot before she cuts the cake. April got her a Vodka and Schnapps shot, and Soph yelled “Oh my god, give her a chaser, she’ll die.”

Then April made sex on the beach.

Snigger.

Sang a bit more, Julia and I owned on “Don’t Hold Back” by the Potbelleez (or however you spell their band name) and then started watching 10 Things I Hate About You.

Everyone pretty much left at that point, and then when Vania left, Julia, Bel and I decided to bid our farewells as well.

It was fun, because everytime someone left we sang happy birthday.

Julia sneezed a lot. Like. A lot. I think Bel counted to 12 (?) in a row.

Played Tap Tap Revenge on the train home. Need to download more songs.

Alex.