Happy birthday Hamwu!

Got a fair amount to write about today. So here goes:

Before I get to Andrew’s surprise dinner, I just want to say that today I finally pinpointed why Jack (the tutor)’s laugh is so strange.

IT SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE DR. HIBBERT FROM THE SIMPSONS!

Alright, so after I finished at my 12:30 session at Jack’s, during which I sat next to 2 strangers and I had Biro, Zhu- and Mon- 2 rows behind me (Jack kept on calling Zhu- “Zohan”) I went to take a train from Springvale up into the city. Springvale, let me say now, is dodgy. I was there on a Sunday afternoon, no EASTER Sunday afternoon, and I felt its dodginess. Imagine a Thursday night. Brr.

Organized to meet April under the Clock (from now on I will refer to “under the clock at Melb Central” as “UCMC”) at around 3:30. So I got there and started playing my DS, and I get a text from her saying that she’d had some ticket inspectors get on the tram and she didn’t have any coins (nor a ticket, obviously). She told me later that when she saw them get on, she kind of said loudly into her phone, “Oh oh okay, I’ll get off right now, see you later!” And walked from Flinders to Melb Central. All that happened was I got an extra 15 minutes of game time.

We went in search for places that are open – toilets first. Had a joke along the way that the only things that are open are ones run by Asians. Not much had proven otherwise as we went up to the bathroom near Nandos on the upper level of Melb Central. One stall was out of toilet paper and the other blocked. Went down to the one near Bubble Cup near the turnstiles. On the way down, we went down an escalator that had stopped. I said to April, “See, this escalator is run by white people. And the one next to us which is still on is run by Asians. Equal job opportunities, but we just work harder.”

Went down Swanston to Starbucks on Lonsdale (I’m getting used to the street names…finally) and sat outside on a bench because the seats were taken (the Starbucks had to be run by Asians). Then a couple in a SmartCar pulled up and parked right beside us. We started laughing at the car because it looked like a normal car with its arse chopped off. The guy went into the cafe to get a drink, and his girlfriend appeared to be trying to sleep in the car. I wondered why she didn’t just recline back when I realized that if she’d reclined her seat she would break through the back of the car.

Sophie came later, and we went up to UCMC, where some people were already waiting. Then, Soph’s boyfriend whose name is rather distinct so I won’t write it here, he came with a Scream mask – as he was going to a costume party later. When Andrew and Dani came – AND IT WAS A SURPRISE! Andrew kept saying how sneaky Dani was – there was about a 5 minute gap between them coming and us leaving, during which SBF (Soph’s boyfriend) went around ghosting people (ghosting, like Hamish and Andy ghosting) in the mask. He followed 2 Asian guys who noticeably walked faster and faster to get away from him. And all we did was stand in a group and giggle. Actually, we walked down Swanston to Red Silks with him in the mask, and an Asian guy took a picture with him and got a hug (we all laughed) and 4 TB Asian girls went past him and started giggling hysterically. Soph is a lucky girl.

Winston gave Andrew 2 huge stuffed animals, a bear and a monkey. I don’t know what he ended up naming them. So the 2 large (when I say large, I mean they’re about the size of my upper body head inclusive) animals went with us into China Town.

I think at this point I should mention the presence of Doug and Kat (or Cat…sorry I didn’t ask), and that Dani gave Andrew a new manly watch. During dinner, the group was split into two. To be blunt, one table were the Asian TBs and gangsters, and the other one was the couples table, except for April, another dude whose name I forgot, and myself. I sat opposite Doug. So Andrew was trying to figure out how to set the time on the watch, and must’ve said something like “wow it has so many functions!” because when I went into the conversation, I heard Doug joking about a watch that had an irony meter – so you don’t look stupid saying something is ironic when it isn’t. Then Dani said that it could also have a Gay-Dar. Doug pretended to go “bip bip bip BEEP BEEP BEEP” when it “pointed” at Dani, and I added, “Dani would probably say, ‘baby, there’s something I need to tell you.’ ‘I ALREADY KNOW!'” And Doug finished with, “At this point the irony meter would probably go off.”

So from that point on all through the night everytime I said irony we would pretend the “irony meter” went off.

Kat, Doug’s girlfriend, is good at singing. And Red Silks decided to play a collection of the sappiest love songs, to which Kat knew most of the lyrics. She would burst into song, which also meant she couldn’t eat. I made the remark that if she sings to every song she knew, she’d never finish her meal. Later on came a song she hated, and she said, “Oh good I get a chance to eat now!”

And, a final mini story. SBF ordered the Kiao Teow, which Red Silks does a bit spicy. SBF was sweating as he was eating it, remarking how much he loves it, and Soph decided to try a bit. Soph does NOT do well with chilli, and started gulping down water. So April handed Soph her water, and I handed Soph mine, and then I took Kat’s to give to Soph. She sat there for 4 minutes afterwards just trying to get the feeling away. In the meantime, Kat and I had a sound argument over whether milk or water is better when dealing with chilli.

So, that was the end of the night. Everyone went to Dani’s place but I had to go home, so I don’t know what happened afterwards. But it was a great night, and SBF in the mask is unforgettable. (Like when he tried to do the Spiderman kiss with the mask half off and it wouldn’t come off.)

Alex.

Advertisements

Pilin’ boxes at the door, tryin’a block it

I can’t believe I actually forgot to update today. So this is a rather late entry for today.

Well, I was right yesterday, we stayed home today. I went online but of course no one was really on because, come on, it’s Boxing Day, everyone’s gone shopping.

I’m going out tomorrow, though, because mom still has to return a pair of shoes she bought. Well not so much return as exchange…because the clerk gave her two right feet. I don’t know. It’s just one of those crazy stupid things that are done by the same kind of people.

Hopefully tomorrow we will go to a good Yum Cha place for lunch. I haven’t had Yum Cha for a while, even though I have had my fair share of dumplings recently. We made a huge batch of them, ate them for nearly 2 weeks, and besides that Carmaine and Bee had wanted to go to a Chinese restaurant on the last day. So. Lots of dumplings.

I remember going to Knox’s (or was it Chadstone?) Myers on Boxing Day 2004. It was boring and we only managed to buy a toy bear, Patrick. I think that day was rather overshadowed in my memory by the fact that we had that tsunami in Indonesia and whatnot, and my friend was holidaying there at the time.

I also remember, it must’ve been 2001, because summer of 2002 I went back to China, or was it 2000? Anyway, I remember in the summer of 00/01, my cousin’s family from Canberra came over, and we went to the city on Boxing Day (now, back then, city was like, an awesome place you go to every once in a while for a treat. Unlike now. For school. And for general living.) and a few shops were closed but we went to Crown and we must’ve walked down Southbank (I didn’t know at the time, it was all a blur to me, basically in my head, Flinders St station was next door to Crown and Exhibition Centre). I was on the tram, and my cousin Julia (different Julia to the one I usually mention who is from my school, of course) was trying to explain what Boxing Day was, but I don’t think she knew it either. Seriously, what the hell is Boxing Day?

Speaking of Julia, I remember on the train back that day (now, it had to have been 2001, because that year we went to Melbourne Zoo. Why the hell do I sound like an old grandma recollecting childhood memories?) it was one of the old ones, I think they all were the old ones back then, and the driver for some reason kept on sounding the horn so Julia and I sang along to that. Okay we were numbskulls. I was also 10. Back then we lived near the Glen, so it was a walk from dinner on Kings Way. We went to Rock Kung (I remember for the following reason) and Julia and I took home the refresher hand towels. We pretended that the air was poisonous and we had to cover our mouths with the hand towels, and we made a racket walking home screaming to each other “NO YOU HAVE TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH COVERED!”

See? Good memories. I think the last time that Julia came over was just before I started MacRob, so summer of ’05. I haven’t seen her since then. I kind of wish they’d come over again (‘cos like hell I’m going to Canberra. If they met us halfway at Sydney maybe) but apparently mom and Julia’s dad, mom’s brother, are having some kind of misunderstanding that Frank, Julia’s dad, doesn’t know about. I mean, it’s stupid because our house is actually rather large now (the last time they came over Julia and I slept on the study floor. While we still don’t exactly have enough beds, we have more bloody room). But I guess it’s all for the best. I mean, what is the kind of person I am now, if family comes over they’d just complain about my hair in my eyes, or the way I talk, or whatever.

Well this turned out to be a long blog.

Hey, a small bit of info about me you might not have known: I love stuffed animals. Soft fur, huggable, either small enough so I can make it a puppet in my hand (small) or large enough to bear hug. I don’t want any hard limbs, I want the really soft kind, with an open and cute face. I have 3 teddy bears (as well as a tiger, a rattlesnake, a dog, a Tassie devil, a Toyota penguin, a very large duck and of course the dog that Viv gave me this year. All of the abovementioned animals are named after their specie, ie Tiger, Snake, Dog, Taz, Toyota, Duck, and I called the new dog Andrew…guess why. And the bears are Patrick, Ranger – being a ranger bear – and Bear).

Wasn’t that edge-of-your-seat-interesting?

Hey, whoever comments, tell me something about yourself that I don’t know.

De Fluffe, Out.